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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: Jacidrinkswine on June 24, 2016, 04:33:26 PM



Title: She thinks she is pregnant- help
Post by: Jacidrinkswine on June 24, 2016, 04:33:26 PM
Broke no cantact 6 weeks after breakup. Swore she was on the pill. Now she claimes she missed a bunch of pills and is pregnant.  I don't want a baby.  Help help help. This is like a bad dream that I can't wake up from.


Title: Re: She thinks she is pregnant- help
Post by: adventurer on June 24, 2016, 05:23:36 PM
Don't panic yet, this is very typical behavior and there is an extremely high probability that she is not being truthful.

Maintain low contact for now, stay emotionally detatched and keep communication for logistics only.  If she is actually pregnant, get a consultation with a family law attorney.  You will need to arrange a paternity test at a place of your choosing where she cannot sabotage the results.  :)o not let this fact guilt you or oblige you into re-entering a relationship with this woman.

This story has been repeated hundreds and hundreds of times and it is very rare that 1. they are actually pregnant and 2. you are actually the father.  Worst case scenario she is pregnant with your child, you will stay on these boards and learn a lot of the great techniques to manage co-parenting, boundaries and self-soothing emotional regulation. I personally know a guy in this type of situation and his daughter is wonderful and a great delight to his life, despite his problems with the mother.


Title: Re: She thinks she is pregnant- help
Post by: unsureuncertain on June 24, 2016, 07:05:08 PM
Sadly it is hard to trust people with BPD even if their intentions are well meaning. I would encourage you to communicate with her and try and get as much information as possible so you can make an informed plan. This is a challenging situation because it could affect you for the rest of your lives so try and be smart in your actions.


Title: Re: She thinks she is pregnant- help
Post by: sanemom on June 24, 2016, 09:42:16 PM
Definitely a common play by a BPD woman... .it must be in their playbook.  I agree with everyone else--first make sure she is pregnant; then, if so, make sure the baby is yours.