BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: kc sunshine on June 28, 2016, 01:48:28 PM



Title: Hard day today, trying to refocus
Post by: kc sunshine on June 28, 2016, 01:48:28 PM
It's a hard day today, after some texting with my ex yesterday. I've gotta refocus. Here are some things I'm going to do, in different categories.

1. Healing

a. signed up for a DBT therapy/support group for friends and family of people with emotional dysregulation disorder

b. writing this message right now on this board!

c. trying to lean into the pain

2. Work

a. answered emails

b. submitted grades

c. Will try to do some writing

3. Fun

a. Will go swimming!

b. tennis!

c. spend time with my family and try to smile a lot with them



Title: Re: Hard day today, trying to refocus
Post by: Lucky Jim on June 28, 2016, 02:38:38 PM
Hey kc, It sounds like you feel lousy after exchanging texts with your Ex yesterday.  What would you like to see happen?  Are you hoping to get back together with your Ex?  If not, maybe you should limit your contact (go LC) with your Ex.  I like your three-pronged approach and concur about leaning into the sharp edges.  LJ


Title: Re: Hard day today, trying to refocus
Post by: kc sunshine on June 28, 2016, 02:42:54 PM
Thanks Lucky Jim.

I am feeling lousy-- this time around (third major breakup) this phrase keeps coming into my head when I feel like this: it's a nightmare that I can't wake up from. It all happened so fast. I know it is probably for the best for the both of us but I miss her so much sometimes.

Okay, off to play tennis. Hopefully that helps.



Hey kc, It sounds like you feel lousy after exchanging texts with your Ex yesterday.  What would you like to see happen?  Are you hoping to get back together with your Ex?  If not, maybe you should limit your contact (go LC) with your Ex.  I like your three-pronged approach and concur about leaning into the sharp edges.  LJ



Title: Re: Hard day today, trying to refocus
Post by: Lucky Jim on June 28, 2016, 02:56:34 PM
Hello again, KC, Great, glad you are off to hit some tennis balls.  I know about the nightmare; it was my life, too, at one point.  You may not believe this, but you have the power to end the nightmare, when you are ready to do it.

Let me repeat my previous question: What would you like to see happen?  There's no particular right or wrong answer and I won't judge your response, but it might help you to focus if you can articulate what you see as your goal/hope at this point.

LuckyJim



Title: Re: Hard day today, trying to refocus
Post by: JerryRG on June 28, 2016, 04:04:24 PM
Kc sunshine 

Nice work :)