BPDFamily.com

Hello everyone

I started my morning prayer and usually I go through a laundry list of people I ask for blessings and help.

This morning I got an inner voice that gave me answers.

1. Is your BPDgf healthy now or when you met her?

2. She goes from one relationship to another because she can't be alone. (The company she keeps while alone is unbearable)

3. Physically she's breaking down

4. What rational man would chose to be with someone so ill.

Then I asked my higher power (God) to remove my character defects... .my answer?

Why do you think I brought this woman into your life?

Every defect you now wish to be removed has been brought to your attention because of her.

Anger

Temper

Resentment

Fear

Self pity

Selfishness

Pride

Ego

Jealousy

Control

Forgiveness

This is a short list, all the character flaws that keep my life in turmoil were buried deep in my subconscious and now I have an opportunity to really change myself.

That is indeed powerful.

I wrote in another post, that I have exited the relationship a far better human being than when I entered it. I spoke with a Counsellor on Monday about guilt over something I did in 2005 (housemate who was going through a tough time & we clashed). Her answer was 'the you of 2016 would have treated him with compassion and care, but in 2005 you didn't have the tools and did what you thought was right'.

Thanks for this post JerryRG, it does help to think that the relationship meant something, even if only to strip away those bad qualities in me.

Thank you seenr

We never have to stop getting well and I find this a new adventure, before my relationship I was stale and during the relationship I was traumatized and now I know I am the only person I can truly help and my health, my life are a gift I won't take for granted again.

This whole experience has given me the growth I needed (though be it painful and slightly accelerated) and I have a beautiful 2 year old son to share this new way of living with. Maybe that's what's it all about.

I must add before I forget that recognizing our character assets is just as important as our flaws, without our deliberate focus on our good qualities we may hinder our own self esteem. So yes pat ourselves on the back for all the good we do each day, I was told that our willingness to please God does in deed please Him.

Allow the goodness inside you to show through :)

I know where you're coming from JerryRG. I had completely stopped growing and was in a rut when I met my BPDxbf. I was in a static and lifeless marriage and really thought I had no problems. How wrong I was. God does have this way of turning us upside down when we are ready for growth. Good on you for admitting your faults.

Lifewriter x

Superb, JerryRG. It seems you're blessed with a good quantity of things to consider.


Yes, I definitely agree.


I'd consider that quite a substantial list  :)  I think it's also a great example of the kinds of things that seem to trouble a lot of us. Sometimes, we want courage to confront these issues and humble ourselves to deal with them adequately. Take courage! One at a time  |iiii

Please keep us posted on how things go--I think you're definitely on to something here.

Good Idea... .I feel like I am coming out a better person than when I went in as well. The things I did when I met him, I would never do now. I feel better for that. Good idea to make that list as well... Good for you and thanks for the idea. Glad you are feeling better... .  :)

 

very inspiring thanks jerry

Jerry,

Wonderful and thanks for inspiring me today.

I have found my prayer time, meditation time and Ho'oponopono during the day keeps me centred and grounded.

You have an awesome list, and admire all you are doing for your son, personal growth and well being.

If you are unhappy, prayer can lift you into a new lightness of heart, joy, and happiness.

If you are plagued with resentment or hurt regarding a person or situation, prayer can bring a new understanding to you that will fill you with new peace and amazing love. If you are fearful, prayer can transform you into a person of great courage. If you appear sick or financially lacking, prayer can heal your body and restore your affairs. There is nothing prayer cannot do for you. Prayer is an inner line of communication between you and your Creator. Prayer is your inner contact with wisdom, understanding, and inspiration

May your journey in healing and life be peaceful.