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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: UnforgivenII on July 23, 2016, 02:18:44 PM



Title: Things they do. Reminder. Feel free to add yours
Post by: UnforgivenII on July 23, 2016, 02:18:44 PM
If any time I should be so stupid to come back, I will remember this list. And so should you.
My sweet wonderful man (bleah) did the following (in just less than three months)

Humiliating outbursts of anger on the bus or walking in the street
Openly flirting with my friends in front of me. He hugged them and I walked alone
We had sex four times in three months in the weirdest way EVER and he was unable to "finish"
Broke his mobile throwing it on the floor at 3am then cries like a baby as he lost his "contacts"
We went to buy another mobile, he forgot the money and I lent to him. He never gave me my money back (I am a broke single mum, mind you)
He avoided any occasion to have sex with me. Watching him run was comical in the end
During an argument he pretended to swoon and fell on the floor
Triangulation from day one
Endless calling from female friends
Unable to talk after the first break up he sent me one of his flying monkeys a girl 26yrs old (he is 46 and I am 48)
Never a beautiful gift: Stingy
He spent lots of money on his comics collection every week. He never ever asked me if I needed something, knowing perfectly my situation
He does not drive. I was the taxi driver. Picking him up and bringing him back home
Precarious jobs
He knows he is not ok but tells he can manage by himself
Came to my house drunk
Threatens suicide
Two pending trials for protesting against the police
Jumps out from my car while I was driving
I was back in therapy right from the start as I sensed something wrong
Insults


Please tell me I am not the crazy one

Who would not miss a love like this?
Any comments appreciated


Title: Re: Things they do. Reminder. Feel free to add yours
Post by: michel71 on July 23, 2016, 08:59:25 PM
This is a GREAT post! Thank you.
I can add some things. We all can. Our journals should be chock full of all the bad things that have ever done to us.
Here are a few of my top ones:
Leaving me at Heathrow after arguing with me in the car, refusing to take my calls as I was waiting for my flight and then sending me on a 10 hour flight a complete emotional wreck.
When I suggested that we save money and budget she showed her "agreement" by taking an expensive trip to Spain.
Post wedding but not yet living together (immigration process) she asked me to send her money to make ends meet. She had a good job so I was a little perplexed but I had just inherited some money. Of course I willingly gave her what she needed and she kept uping the amount until I found myself with little money left. She says now I "forced her" to take the money and she doesn't think she did anything wrong or has any marital obligation to replace our savings.
She "lost" her engagement ring and didn't seem that broken up about it. I am still paying for it by the way.
She finally got a job after a year of being here and then quit it the first day because we had an argument.
She got another job about a year later, was making about 4k per month (cash) and said she needed to save the money for flights for her kids. Despite our mounting bills I was generously given the sum of $200 and she bought the occasional gallon of milk.
She hasn't lifted a finger in two years to clean our house, save the kitchen counters. I clean and cook because she won't. Back in her country her house was immaculate.

There is so much more but I get a headache just reliving it! LOL