Title: Exgf is making it clear she's alone and I wonder why? No I don't Post by: JerryRG on September 07, 2016, 08:51:14 PM Exgf emailed today and made it clear for the second or third time she's alone and will be caring for our son alone again.
She's also asking me to take her to my AA meetings. I may be stupid but I'm seeing a bs storm headed my way. As much as I care about her and hope and pray she gets well, she's going to walk this walk without me holding her hand. She said she's on chemo and she was washing her hair today and her ponytail fell out. I don't know what to think or believe. I just cannot be around her until she's healthy, I've worked too hard to give up my peace and happiness. Title: Re: Exgf is making it clear she's alone and I wonder why? No I don't Post by: hope2727 on September 07, 2016, 09:59:11 PM I have followed your posts and I am so sorry for your struggle. I highly suggest you google "grey rock' and learn the technique. It has helped me immensely. Now i clearly decide if what I receive is worth a response. If no I don't If yes my favourite word is "oh". Then I be as boring as possible. It works wonders.
Seriously I'm to tired to explain more but if you google it you will find several well written articles. Title: Re: Exgf is making it clear she's alone and I wonder why? No I don't Post by: JerryRG on September 07, 2016, 10:10:18 PM Thank you hope2727
I have heard about grey rock, it does work with BPD/narcs. I am educated enough to know what to expect, I've heard many people say pwBPD behave a lot a like. My exgf is following a pretty standard script for BPD. Sure does help to hear from others and listen to their experiences. I would still be in a FOG if not for you and others who choose to help. I've learned one thing, the majority of what I worry about never transpires, things seem to work out if we really focus on doing the right things. I just bought into the lies my exgf threw at me, she's slowly becoming just the sick person she truly is and losing the power I gave her to control me. I am starting to think objectively about her, detaching for me was tenticles that needed to be carefully cut or broken. It was a painful experience that I won't soon repeat. Bounderies, keep the good in, and the bad out. There is hope and peace for us, if we break free of the lies we listen to and those we repeat to ourselves. |