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3 weeks ago my son's mother was begging for my help to  get her into treatment and away from her abusive bf.

Of coarse that's no longer true of her.

Yesterday she told me she no longer needs/wants treatment for her past drug addiction.

She says God cured her, she's fine now... .

I asked her if God healed everyone then why do we have doctors and dentist and treatment centers and... .

Then I asked her if she's hungry does she go get food or does her God drop it from heaven in her lap?

She said "YES!"

I had no idea things worked this way, why do I leave my bed in the morning when all I need do is close my eyes and pray and "poof" I get whatever I want.

I know God does miraculous healing and that isn't my question, I've been saved from many terrible demises, (exgf for one) - (another story)

I've learned that my relationship with God is a cooperation, He leads and I walk, if I do not take an action I am useless to Him. Life revolves around choices and actions, not intent.

I believe this is just more proof that my son's mother isn't in touch with reality. She believes she just snaps her finger and her genie, Santa Claus will deliver.

Anyone else think she's delusional or worse? I've seen her completely psychotic many times in the past.

Do you think God put this woman in your life for a reason Jerry?  If so, what is that reason?

Thank you fromheeltoheal

Oh I have no dought that God wanted me to NOT have her in my life and I was warned by everyone including my exgf, she told me up front that she would f up my life.

The amazing thing is God took all that she dished out and put me through and turned it all into good.

I believe God is good and He will turn our lives and mistakes around to benifit us. I believe the real healing comes when we acknowledge our mistakes and start doing what is right and not just what suites us or what is convenient.

What do you think fromheeltoheal?

I started talking to my exgf on Christmas eve 2012

Dec 28 I had a spiritual experience that to this day I do not understand.

I like it!  So how are those beliefs showing up in relation to your ex?

Hmm well, I know now I cannot fix her

I really don't want to be around her.

She's not someone I can trust and she can be dangerous.

I had such low self esteem at that point I would settle for her abuse.

I know now that I have my own issues that contribute to bad choices and relationships that are dysfunctional.

I'm going to continue to grow, learn and develop into the man I can be. Be my best, happy, joyous and free, just as I was meant to be.

If I continue to get well, my children will reap the benifits as well.

Thank you fromheeltoheal

Got to run, I need to put more thought into this.

Jerry, you will be the man you want to be, I know this. Keep building your case for custody, her and her strange Bf are handing it to you on a plate. Keep going to your church and coming here and you will make it. I believe in you   x

Well, if God took care of things instantly then I would ask him to make this hurricane headed my way to go back out into the ocean! This kind of thing puts things in perspective! Sometimes there is nothing you can do... .you know her very well right now. You know she is going to change her mind all the time. Somehow you need to stop letting this get to you. It's just going to keep stressing you out until you figure out how you can overcome this. It's one thing to let her play games over your son... .another to talk about how she is living her life. You sound like you're having trouble disengaging. So, what do you think you can do to get untangled from her? I know you are looking for validation too, we agree with you that she's not handling things well. My ex didn't and doesn't either. But that's their problem. What can you do about how you react to her differently?

Thank you Sadly for believing in me :)

Thank you Herodias

I talked to her pastor today, he cleared up many things, he agrees with everyone else, my exgf is extremly ill and needs help.

This is what keeps me stuck, I and everyone know her time is coming, I prayed for that day for many long years and it's still not here.

All I ever wanted was for her to accept I loved her and my hope was that she would learn to love herself. When I started to become well, it made me even more sad because I started to realize how sick we both were.

While I toughed out the many meetings and brutal honesty from sponsors and friend and family, she chose to live in her world.

We grew apart, I had no choice but to stop the madness

She found another enabler and he's trying to save her, he's only prolonging her suffering just as I was.

I didn't get my wish, to see her happy

Everything I did, even giving her my child, she now let's slip into nothing

God saved me from misery, insanity, chaos and death


It's heart breaking walking away from those we care and love so much and watch them fail.

My exgf will lose everything

She's just to sick to understand

My son needs me well, I won't be well around her

Letting go is my only option

Lol Jerry ! Your ex sounds like mine in some ways. In the beginning she spoke about God and how she sees things etc. She even bought a book called Spiritual emergencies because she thought her mental illness was actually her experiencing religious stuff. For example seeing things hearing things.  I was like wow you have no idea how sick you really are.