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Title: Thoughts after a month of NC Post by: Infern0 on October 17, 2016, 07:40:49 AM The good news is I'm able to bounce back from the disappointment quite quickly these days.
But it's become pretty much unquestionable that I simply cannot be in contact with her whatsoever. This saddens me a great deal but the effect it has on me is not acceptable. Some of it is my fault. I try to be as self aware as possible, but the bad memories will always come back, and her lack of remorse or any kind of apology make it unbearable. She wants me to be able to just forget it all and be "like I was in the beginning" But I'm the beginning was before she had done anything bad to me haha, so it's a bit difficult to say the least. Maybe I could do it with a real apology and effort to change on her part but like I say she wants me to just forget it happened and for her to not be accountable in any way. And I just can't do that. She's quit school again, I mean she has done that 3 years on a row now costing her parents over $8000 in tuition fees, and all she's doing is going clubbing with her friend 3 nights a week picking up guys. It's just sad. She was 18 when I met her now she's almost 22. She's gone from someone u thought there was hope for to someone who is seemingly set in her ways. Back in the day she saw that she hurt people and showed remorse and concern for it even if she couldn't stop it. Now she doesn't even see it anymore. Even her ex after me killing himself had seemingly no impact on her. Sad, very very sad. Title: Re: Thoughts after a month of NC Post by: amunt on October 17, 2016, 07:58:03 AM Why you do that to yourself ? Time will heal you and you will forget her, she is a demon
Title: Re: Thoughts after a month of NC Post by: fromheeltoheal on October 17, 2016, 08:35:47 AM The good news is I'm able to bounce back from the disappointment quite quickly these days. But it's become pretty much unquestionable that I simply cannot be in contact with her whatsoever. This saddens me a great deal but the effect it has on me is not acceptable. Some of it is my fault. I try to be as self aware as possible, but the bad memories will always come back, and her lack of remorse or any kind of apology make it unbearable. Yes, it's a tough choice Inferno, a conflict, and eventually we accept we need to do what's best for us, as sad as that is, but good for you! And your ability to bounce back will get even quicker with time, as you detach and heal. Why you do that to yourself ? Time will heal you and you will forget her, she is a demon No, actually she's a human being with a personality disorder amunt. It's natural to assign negative labels and malicious intent to those who have hurt us, and anger is a stage of detaching, the good news is that passes, and when it does our perception of our ex and their intent changes. It's freeing when that happens, and it's helpful to check in and see where we are in the process yes? |