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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: FallBack!Monster on November 03, 2016, 12:51:17 PM



Title: Ex BPD worries
Post by: FallBack!Monster on November 03, 2016, 12:51:17 PM
Meaning well with what I share. Not always taken as. love my ex. She has done everything under the sun to tell me to move on except say it. No argument there. Can't help but to care. She's using again. Wish she'd get that drinking especially demolish the effecs of her meds. Wouldnt dare say it to her face. She'd take it as criticism. I love her and wish her well. There's nothing good in me now, in her perception. I am working on me but I care, okay.


Title: Re: Ex BPD worries
Post by: Rayban on November 03, 2016, 03:46:23 PM
Hi NoGd4rs,

People who suffer with BPD tend to hurt those who care for them the most. It's unfortunate, but she will decide when it's time to get help. Don't let her perception of you shape who you are as a person.  Devaluation is a defense mechanism, and like so many other dm' s it is difficult to accept and understand.


Title: Re: Ex BPD worries
Post by: FallBack!Monster on November 03, 2016, 04:42:22 PM
Excerpt
People who suffer with BPD tend to hurt those who care for them the most.
and Did I learn that! Not trying to date her again but I care about her well-being. Use to refer to her as wifey.

Excerpt
she will decide when it's time to get help.
Hope so but I know for a fact she she's in denial about the harm in it. Tried making a bit of a comment in regards to it when i witness it. My ex was completely dismissive. Said its not that bad.

 
Excerpt
Don't let her perception of you shape who you are as a person.
Unfortunately it did, bc bruises hurt, but they also heal. I should know.

Excerpt
Devaluation is a defense mechanism, and like so many other dm' s it is difficult to accept and understand.
Had more of a fight accepting than understanding. My head & heart are finally working together. Doesn't mean I won't remember her. doesn't mean I can't still care.

'preciate the encouraging words.