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Been searching for myself. Thinking I might be depress but don't know. Missing my ex when I should not be. Can sleep when i should be. Time has passed and I don't feel like me. I accept I lost what I thought was my future, my soul friend, my love. Forever have loss my mirror. It wasn't taken. Left on its own. I can live with that. I do. Every day and everything is okay. I accept you and who you are.  1000 apologies for your state.  BUT
Where am I? Can't find myself anymore. Where is my soul?  Is it in my exs possession? If it is, wish to get it back. It's mine. My ex doesn't want me anymore. Why keep my soul?  Is it me that's holding on? If yes, what to?  Ive heard the outcome. Not confusing to me at all anymore. I'm painted black for eternity. So be it. Want me back? I ask. I do want me. I do need me. Missing my inner spirit. Miss my real smile. Bring it back. Keep all the others. Please! I pretend but im not doing good.  I need me.

From my heart to God ears.
Thanks for taking the time to read.  This is how I feel.

Hi NoGd,

The confusion after these break-ups can feel like a lonely and disorienting place to be. I hear you searching for some answers through the heartbreak. And that's hard. But it is a positive, even if it's hard to see that now. You will find the answers you need and rebuild on surer ground, just so long as you give yourself the time, patience, and compassion you need. I know the feeling of loss and sadness can be overwhelming at times and it's not easy to hear that you just need to be patient and take care of yourself. There is no magic bullet that can instantly wipe the sadness away, though. But if you're good to yourself and are patient in your self-reflection, that will be money in the bank as far as your long-term happiness is concerned.


Are you seeing a therapist? That can do a world of good in making sense of feelings of depression.


I understand these feelings. It can help to stop worrying about what you "should" or "should not" be feeling or capable of right now. It's hard, but you find yourself where you find yourself. Searching for answers and wondering who you are. Try embracing that and seeing it as where you need to be right now. The more open and honest you can be with yourself about the future you want, the easier it will be to start working towards it.


These are the right questions. Your ex doesn't have possession of your soul. It's yours to nourish and treasure as you choose. So, what are you holding onto? What did you crave from this relationship? What would it look like to have those needs met in a healthy, sustainable, joyful way?

Hard questions, and they aren't answered in a day. Give yourself time and patience. Caring for yourself means being willing to invest time and compassion into finding lasting answers.

I feel what you feel NG, I wish I could write as well as you do. I felt every word because I share this exact feelings. But most of all because of how well you put words together.  Hang in there, they say. I hope you find what you're looking for.