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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: enlighten me on January 12, 2016, 02:17:19 AM



Title: I never felt neglected as a child
Post by: enlighten me on January 12, 2016, 02:17:19 AM
Childhood Emotional Neglect - a condition which is the effect of a parent’s failure to respond enough to a child’s emotional needs. We all have differing levels of emotional needs and sometimes parents don't rise to meet those needs of one or more of their children. Parents who learn about childhood emotional neglect often wonder what they have done to cause it. Nonetheless, the effects can be significant on us as we become adults.

Jonice Webb, PhD., explores this issue in her book, Running on Empty.

What is your total score?

41 but I never felt neglected as a child.

I had a happy loving childhood so I don't feel that the author is correct with her idea. Yes I agree that neglect as a child would cause problems later in life but I think some of us are built a certain way and no matter how loving a childhood we had we would end up a certain way.

I watched a program on psychopaths a while back and the doctor doing the research was investigating the gene he felt was responsible. He participated with the tests and the results shocked him as along with the murderers he had this same gene. The difference for him though was that he had a loving upbringing but he still had a lot of traits that his family told him about when he mentioned his findings and was told by them that they weren't surprised.

So I personally feel that we can be born a certain way but neglect will exacerbate any underlying condition. Unless its obviously abusive and then I don't think it would matter how we where born.


Title: I never felt neglected as a child
Post by: wundress on January 12, 2016, 02:26:48 AM
 C<||| enlighten me

I agreed with you up to the point about abuse. I think we are born with different levels of resilience. Even those who are abused seem to cope differently. Some people who go through the most horrific abuse seems to have the ability to bounce back and make the best of a bad situation.

But yes, I think neglect exacerbates any potential to develop mental health disorders. I was watching another program about psychopaths. They kept saying that the murderers in question had come from lovely families and had good childhoods. I'll bet the families did look happy from the outside but quite often dysfunctional families do.


Title: I never felt neglected as a child
Post by: enlighten me on January 12, 2016, 02:40:03 AM
True wundress there are people who are very resilient and no matter how bad things where it doesn't seem to affect them. That said though everything has some affect on us be it good or bad things. It all makes us who we are and as we experience more things then we change.

With abuse the consensus is the victim either becomes an abuser or a protector. I don't know if anyone just gets on with life but I think it would have some effect no matter how resilient that person was.