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When xw and I were together and before our son was born, I was cleaning up around the yard and found a round piece of steel sticking out of the ground. I came in the house and told my than GF, what I found, I said good thing I found that piece of steel before kids tripped and fell on it and got hurt. I was expecting a kind word or compliment or positive feed back of some kind. Even by this point in our r/s there was no kind words but I was always for that pat on the back. Her words to me were " there won't be any kids playing around here." I never caught it back than, it wasn't until years later it hit me what she meant.

Hi bus boy, I call these ‘gloomy predictions’. My ex used to say similar things. He’d sometimes rage at me that his home would NEVER be mine, and that we’d NEVER make it as a couple because of something or other I did. I think they’re acting out their core abandonment wounds when they’re like this. It’s as if they have a crystal ball and can foresee into the future, but it’s really their dark expectations at play. A self-fulfilling prophecy of doom and gloom and the end of the relationship. It’s part of the black and white thinking depending on the mood of the moment. When the switch flipped he’d predict a wonderful, amazing future for us. I suppose what I'm trying to say is it wasn't about you personally. She was acting out her fears.

Xw had odd fears about a future with me and having children. She would say only negative things never once did she say anything about a happy future. Her demands on me that I had to meet before we could ever have children were extremely bizarre to say the least.