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Title: Idealize, devalue, discard? Post by: Weary1402 on January 27, 2017, 08:10:16 AM I find terminology here that I haven't heard before. This one knocked the wind out of me. Being torn down for a year has been traumatic enough for me. The thought of being discarded sounds like it may put me over the edge. I began to think there is a part of me that is satisfied by how much she loves me. It's unhealthy, I know. But it's strong and something I must have needed? I had better prepare myself.
Title: Re: Idealize, devalue, discard? Post by: ynwa on January 27, 2017, 10:00:50 AM Hello Weary,
I hear you. That word is a bit clinical and cold isn't it? But it is used in a definition of describing emotion. I'd like to say that it also has a positive meaning, it opens a doorway for those of us on the board to follow a brighter path. I've read some of yours posts and see just how much you went through for someone you loved. Detachment helps see that we can let go, even just a little to take a breath. How are you going to prepare? Title: Re: Idealize, devalue, discard? Post by: infjEpic on January 27, 2017, 10:58:33 AM I find terminology here that I haven't heard before. This one knocked the wind out of me. Being torn down for a year has been traumatic enough for me. The thought of being discarded sounds like it may put me over the edge. I began to think there is a part of me that is satisfied by how much she loves me. It's unhealthy, I know. But it's strong and something I must have needed? I had better prepare myself. It seems the relationship is still ongoing? Title: Re: Idealize, devalue, discard? Post by: Hisaccount on January 27, 2017, 01:25:54 PM That sums up my relationship perfectly.
Idealization, I was perfect, even my flaws, soul mate, blah, blah, blah. Devalue, She didn't trust what I told her, If I told her the sky was blue she would not believe me. Then belittle me for it. Call me controlling or a liar. Discard, yep that is what happened next. So glad to be rid of her. You will see it too. |