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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: The DJ on December 27, 2024, 11:56:42 AM



Title: Engagement was ended with my BPD fiance.
Post by: The DJ on December 27, 2024, 11:56:42 AM
Hello.  My 2 year relationship with my fiance just ended.  BPD that was never addressed brought our relationship crashing down. I'm devastated and so is my daughter because she became so close to my fiance.  I'm just feeling lost, and feel like I have no one to talk to.  I think most people don't know what it's like to be in a relationship with someone with BPD.


Title: Re: Engagement was ended with my BPD fiance.
Post by: kells76 on December 27, 2024, 01:40:00 PM
Hi The DJ and a warm *welcome*

You're not alone here; so many members have experienced feeling like they can't talk to people about the unique challenges of their BPD relationship. It's been helpful to me to have found this place and to feel like I can share some really stressful and uncommon experiences, and to know that I'll be surrounded with people who truly get it.

I'm so sorry you're experiencing a gut-wrenching breakup. Can you tell me some more about how it went down? Did your partner call it off, did you, was it mutual, what was the event that seemed to set it off?

How old is your daughter? I am guessing that your fiance is not your daughter's other parent? How is everyone's relationship with your D's other parent? Asking to get a fuller picture of the support your D has right now.

Keep talking, whenever works for you... we'll be listening.

kells76


Title: Re: Engagement was ended with my BPD fiance.
Post by: seekingtheway on December 27, 2024, 02:59:30 PM
Hi The DJ,

Welcome to the board!

I'm totally with you on that one, I don't think many people do understand what it's like to be in/have been in a relationship with someone with BPD. For me, it was an experience that completely threw me in every possible way, and to be honest, I'm still working to put all the pieces back together. Talking about it does help, but I found that my friends were only able to offer a shallow level of understanding. A couple of my friends who have been through narcissist relationships had some idea of what I was going through, but generally most people were unable to understand the level of pain and confusion I was in afterwards.

This board has been a great support in moments where I've needed to work through something. You'll find lots of experience and wisdom here, so feel free to share whatever you like so that we can help you through it.

I'm sorry both you and your daughter are in a place where you're feeling so devastated. It's a tough time. Do you have support around you?