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Title: Codependent with an addict Post by: 6105 on March 15, 2025, 01:40:53 PM Hello, whoever sees this.
I live with a woman who used to be my lover, but now I haven't touched in many years. I don't even want to anymore. She depends on me for all her basic needs (food, lodgings, support of all kinds, etc) but gives me grief, judgement, guilt, and pretty much any other toxic waste you can think of. I'm deeply depressed, never go out, and barely even speak to her anymore. I let her stay in my home. I feel obligated to do this because she was there for me through a very bad period in my life, so I kind of owe her. She simply doesn't take care of herself at all. She won't even bathe. She's discovered online food delivery, so now she's over 300 lbs and growing. She uses enough cannabis to host her own Woodstock. She suffers from both real and imaginary health issues. She's content to decline and wait for her death, and seems not to notice that I'm letting her drag me down with her. I'm sure it hasn't occurred to her at all. Any ideas? Title: Re: Codependent with an addict Post by: Lasttry on March 17, 2025, 02:26:18 AM Hello.
I fully understand this feeling, I was very ill a few years ago. I almost died, at this point all affection with my wife stopped, she shut down I guess, there was a bit of blame there on me from her, perhaps abandonment issues? Anyway things got worse from there, we now live together, through her choice, and it's awful, mostly because it's not what I ever wanted, it's all her choice. Anyway, your wife/partner may have help with your problems, but that doesn't mean you have to suffer for the rest of your life, if you helped someone should he owe you for the rest of their life? |