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Title: Surviving Post by: Wifemomnurse329 on August 19, 2025, 08:30:36 PM I have been married 32 years. I was looking for self help books to read and came upon “ Stop walking on Eggshells”. It answered so many questions I’ve had over the years. The problem is, I am tired. I don’t know if I want to stay in this relationship. He had exhausted me. He will not get help or even admit his part. I feel trapped because he does not show his BPD symptoms to others. I get the brunt of it all.
Title: Re: Surviving Post by: Alex V on August 20, 2025, 11:02:20 PM I recognize your story. My wife left me (and kids and house) after 26 years without telling me why. I should work on myself. Asking her what bit, she told me I had to figure out myself. I have had a 8 month study to find out what is happening. Went from ADD to BPS now. I now all makes sense how I feel. The things she told me she struggles with are not mine. Not setting bounderies and letting people (me) cross those. Feeling empty. Moodswings. low self esteem.
I cannot advise you other than what I have read. Listen to them and confirm you understand how they feel, without confirming the feeling itself. For me it is too late I am afraid. Yesterday I received an email saying she has an attorney to arrange this. So sad. I love her, but it drains me. I am not sure she knows she has BPS, but after reading a lot about it, it made me understand my life for the last 26 years. We have lots of good times. Some minor, but the last 5 years were hectic. I assume Covid, moving to the country, her motivation for her business going down, kids growing bigger and detaching, hip operation, menopauze has been a melting pot to get where we are now. I understand how hard this must be for you. You love the "good" version. But the "wrong"version drives you mad. And it is hard to choose just for yourself. In a way you have been taking care for your partner for many many years and now you can't anymore. Take care |