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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: Sammysue1972 on September 22, 2025, 01:48:34 PM



Title: My 29 year old daughter living with bpd
Post by: Sammysue1972 on September 22, 2025, 01:48:34 PM
I have been searching for ever for a website I can come for help to teach me and guide me to insight on this horrible mental disorder.
We was diagnosed at age 18 but they were pretty sure by age 13 that she was suffering with it. She has been hospitalized at least 6 times and has been on all kinds of meds.
She also has a 8 year old son who his bio dad has custody. But she she's him when ever she wants to .


Title: Re: My 29 year old daughter living with bpd
Post by: CC43 on September 22, 2025, 03:10:44 PM
Hi there,

You've come to the right place.  If you take a look at some posts, I bet many of the themes will resonate with you--the sense of desperation, the angry outbursts, the self-destructive behaviors, feeling guilty, estrangement, living in a war zone, total meltdowns, possible suicide attempts, fractured relationships, a victim attitude, constant blaming--does this sound familiar?  Is there a particular issue that's troubling you right now, and would you like advice?  Or maybe you just want to vent, because you're depleted and frustrated?  Six times (or more) in the hospital is a lot . . . and I understand how it's possible to lose count, as the hospitalizations are very upsetting.  Would you care to share a little more about your current situation, so that we get a better idea about where you are in your journey?  Is your daughter living with you?  Is she getting therapy?  Are you getting therapy?  Are you allowed to see your grandson?

I guess if I have just one tidbit for you, it's this:  BPD is not your fault.  But if you are making decisions in a FOG of Fear, Obligation and Guilt, you're just like many parents here, and yet the FOG is preventing you from living your best life.  If you're stuck in a FOG, I'd say, you need to prioritize self-care and start to reclaim your life.  You can start today!  What's one nice little thing you can do for yourself today?  For me, it could be taking a walk in nature.  You need to prioritize self-care because you're no good to your daughter if you're stuck in a FOG and a complete basket case.  You need to be calm and level-headed for the both of you.


Title: Re: My 29 year old daughter living with bpd
Post by: Pook075 on September 22, 2025, 09:35:09 PM
I have been searching for ever for a website I can come for help to teach me and guide me to insight on this horrible mental disorder.
We was diagnosed at age 18 but they were pretty sure by age 13 that she was suffering with it. She has been hospitalized at least 6 times and has been on all kinds of meds.
She also has a 8 year old son who his bio dad has custody. But she she's him when ever she wants to .

Hello and welcome to the family.  I'm so sorry you're going through this and I can relate with a 26 year old BPD daughter.  Like your kid, we saw it much earlier and had no idea how to handle it.

Question- does your daughter still live with you?  Is she working or in college?  Tell us a little more about your relationship with her and please feel free to ask questions.