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Title: i miss him so much im going crazy.. Post by: stixstixstix on March 06, 2017, 03:48:43 AM (revising this) my bf started living with me pretty quickly after we started hanging out because he had just been kicked out of his house... last week i told him he needed to find somewhere else to go because all he does is scream at me lately and is not kind at all (his friend just passed away so i am trying to be sympathetic) i tried to explain pretty clearly i needed my space, but he completely blew up on me and started screaming at me about how i was betraying him and how he had nowhere else to go (despite having a friend to stay with down the street) it was pretty nasty and we've stopped talking and i don't know if it's for the best or not... i miss him so much, i've never missed someone this much and I've never felt heartbroken before, the fact i am very sure he has BPD just exaggerates all of this pain. it's like he doesn't listen to reason or something? I've been trying to message him since then but he either responds really angrily or not at all. he messaged me tonight telling me to "please stop" talking to him. i know he is hurt because i have asked mutual friends about this and they say he refuses to talk about me to them... .is it really over ? maybe i'm just in denial but i feel like i can't stand life without him , but he seems to not want to talk to me anymore. i don't know what to do...
Title: Re: i miss him so much im going crazy.. Post by: livednlearned on March 06, 2017, 11:30:00 AM Hi stix,
Being screamed at is pretty tough! And so is not talking to someone you love. Both are hard. You're probably right that he doesn't listen to reason, especially when dysregulated. Most of us don't do so great at reason when emotions are aroused. Have you two gone through a break like this before? How long have you been together? Glad you found the site LnL Title: Re: i miss him so much im going crazy.. Post by: Mutt on March 06, 2017, 05:48:46 PM Hi stixstixistix,
I'm sorry that you're going through this, I'd give him what he wants for now which is space. Have you checked out our basic tool to the right side of the board Wisemind (https://bpdfamily.com/content/triggering-and-mindfulness-and-wise-mind) Sometimes I like use positive statements coping statements when I feel distressed, for example: It`s okay to feel this way, it`s a normal reaction. This will pass. I'm stronger than I think. |