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Title: why is it i feel so thrown away Post by: doreen on April 03, 2017, 09:17:59 AM can someone please help me,ive just broken up with my partner of 18 months.I have to work with him in same building each night.Tonight he seemed angry after i helped him find a place to saty as he wa previously living at my place now he just seems like he doesnt even want to say hello.he and i agreed to part as i was always unhappy and he knew it was because he used to not talk to me or accuse me of things i hadnt done,i think the last straw came because he can not stop lying to me.so we decided to end our love relationship.My question is does a person with BPD love the same way a normal person would or does there love just cut off when the partner is of no use to them anymore ? any advice or oppinions would be very appreciated.thanks
Title: Re: why is it i feel so thrown away Post by: Mutt on April 03, 2017, 06:26:44 PM Hi Doreen,
*welcome* I'm sorry to hear that, i'd like to welcome you to the group. I can see how hard seeing your ex at work would be everyday and it there's a difficulty curve when your ex suffers from my BPD. I think that they're the most difficult break ups. It helps to talk to others that have gone through a similar experience. To answer question about if pwBPD can love the same as a non disordered, I guess that you would have to think about what traits r/s entails. The answer will probably vary per person but reciprocity is a big one, and it's not just in romantic r/s's, you want that in friendships as well. A pwBPD can't reciprocate like you or I, they have social impairments and they have a lot going on inside. A pwBPD have chronic feelings of shame, have low self worth and self esteem and self loath. BPD has more co-ocurring mental illnesses than other mental illness's and experts are not sure why, usually there's a comorbid anxiety and depression. There's other criterion as well but there's a lot going on internally and it's difficult to put yourself in someone shoes when you're fighting your internal battles. Here's a link to an article from a senior member, everyone is different and will have different opinions, but it's her opinion on how a pwBPD feel love. My Definition of Love. I have Borderline Personality Disorder. (https://bpdfamily.com/content/my-definition-love-i-have-borderline-personality-disorder) |