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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: ConfusedNHurt on April 04, 2017, 12:07:39 AM



Title: Worst episode in 17 years together
Post by: ConfusedNHurt on April 04, 2017, 12:07:39 AM
I've watched my wife go through episodes in the past. Usually only lasted a few days, then she'd come back to reality. This time it's been a month and she's been sleeping with as many guys as she can without protection. She was sick and bed ridden for the last 5 months with a mystery illness that resembles multiple sclerosis. She's been sick before too with unexplainable illnesses, but this was the worst with 3 weeks in the hospital, 6 weeks in a nursing home and another 2 months in need at home doing physical therapy. The day that they cleared her she had an affair and asked for a divorce. A week later she bought a one way ticket to the opposite side of the country. She came back a week later saying she missed me and wanted to work things out. That didn't last long. She's back to homing up with random guys and is sure reach one of them is "the one" until they don't return her calls or texts the next day. I don't know how to handle this.


Title: Re: Worst episode in 17 years together
Post by: Meili on April 04, 2017, 11:46:06 AM
*welcome*

Infidelity is hard, serial infidelity is much worse. I'm sorry for what you're going through but glad you have found a community where many of us have been through similar experiences, and we can learn from each other.

When you said that she's gone through episodes in the past, what did you mean? Can you elaborate?

Do the two of you have any kids?

The only real way that I know of to handle adultery is by defining and maintaining a boundary that you are comfortable with. Some people can accept infidelity in their relationship and have a less strict boundary, such as all sex outside of the relationship has to include protection. Others are very firm on the line of neither party having a physically intimate relationship with a third-party and any crossing of that line will be the end of the relationship. Each relationship is unique, so you'll have to decide where you stand on this issue and where your boundary is.

I would suggest that you continue to read the posts, read the articles contained on this web site, and some of the recommended books. I know your life is difficult now, but knowledge will help you make the right decisions. We'll help and support you however we can.

Keep us posted!