BPDFamily.com

Hey folks.

I have made a post previously a few weeks ago on my full story, but I guess here's my current situation.
 
My girlfriend and I have been broken up for just over 2 weeks now, and in this time she has been texting me off and on. Sometimes seems angry and blunt and sometimes she seems in a good mood and genuinely wants to talk about random things like a new tv show she's loving ect.
I have given her complete space not texting her first and when she reaches out to me I use good validation and the 'when they push you away, you push away a little further, and when they pull you in you play it cool and pull back a little'. So far, it seems I have been doing a good job. And I notice she goes online on our whatsapp convo a hundred times a day to see when the last time I was on the conversation... It's a thing we both used to do when bickering, to see when we're thinking of eachother ect (lame I know). So I guess that's a sign I'm still on her mind, which seems good news. I have avoided doing it now to pull back from her a little more. In hopes she'll contact me and want to work things out of course.

She asked me for her stuff that she had left at my place the day after she broke it off with me and since then nothing has happened about it. I am thinking if it would be a decent idea for me to ask if I could go to her place to drop off her stuff, then when I'm there try to talk to her face to face. She has never shown a mean side of herself to me in person, only through text. And I feel if I'm there she'll be different in a good way and we could actually communicate properly with one another.

So what do you think, would this be a good idea? Or is it still too risky for her to push me away further?
Advice on what to do if I do or don't go ahead with this would be much appreciated!

Big thanks.
S

I'm in the same boat - very afraid that getting my things will make it worse.  I agreed with him that I should "move on" and he attempted suicide (don't mean to alarm you). I haven't spoken to him since (6 weeks now) and I'm not sure what getting my things will do.

would it be best if you don't see him, send someone else to collect...

it seems like a bit of a mixed bag to me, to try to affect a reconciliation under the guise of bringing her stuff. a meet up could help, but i wouldnt mix the two.

I would just let her go.  As much as it hurts to hear, it rartely if works the 2nd,3rd,4th,5th,6th or 7th time.   I've been there with my BPD ex and never works, only gets harder and causes more pain.  Im 6 months split and I think about her everyday.  Wishing we could get back together, but then I realize all the crap she put me through, how hard I tried to make it work, only for the cycle to keep repeating itself.  It sucks most BPD's are so fun and leave you feeling like they're the only one for you.

I find this is the painful part, very true.

It really seems that way. I did more with my ex than I did with anyone and it feels like I will never do so much again ... .I miss that as much as I miss her and I am envious in some respects of my replacement. I had the most amazing times when I wasn't being hurt and in the good days or between being recycled and being made up to. Totally sucked in by the false hope (as I now understand it) that at the time was brilliant

Don't reach out. In a case of BPD or non I wouldn't. You probally won't listen to that advice but it's the best on the page. And it doesn't matter how long it's been or how long it's gonna be.

Work on yourself. It's what you have control over.

Two weeks is a a very short time...i remember being there...it has now been over three years for me and it sucks ...hang in there and follow the suggestions given here, as hard as it may seem . They will help. Prepare your self for a long road.