BPDFamily.com

My suspected BPD ex wanted to marry me, have children with me, had never loved anyone like she loved me, I was her one and only, she was lucky to have me in her life ... .all things she said ... .3/4 weeks later, had moved to the otherside of the world after a 3 month as I see it now, recycling. I cannot get my head around whether any of this was true and sincere? I asked her and was told it was the truth ? How can you go from wanting it all and saying it all to then walking away?

She meant it at the time she said it and only then.

It's so damaging to you on the receiving end  

In that moment, it was very true and very sincere.

I never understood how ex could go from love bombing me one minute to chasing somebody else the next minute. He was telling me a bunch of sweet stuff one time after I kicked him out. I told him I didn't believe a word he said. There was some back and forth between us. I finally told him, "Yes, what you are saying is true at this moment. In 20 minutes, that could change." I don't even remember exactly what he was telling me. I just know that it took me a while to see that he very much lives in the moment. If he feels something at this moment, then he takes that as a fact and wants to run with it.

I also think that ex didn't want to hurt my feelings or disappoint me. Rather than tell me the truth, he would rather string me along and let me think that there was hope only to turn around and do something that was the equivalent of walking away. I kicked ex out over a year ago. It still bugs me that he proclaimed to want and love his family so much yet when he left he immediately went and found somebody else and had to brag about her to me. Some things defy explanations. All I can do is acknowledge how much it hurt. How can somebody claim to love you so much yet move on so quickly? At times, it almost feels like I didn't even exist to him. Now, I am just a little blip on his radar.

they only think of themselves... it's all about them, not you... Most of us here have had the idealising, how perfect we are and how much they want us. The reality is right there, but it is painful for us to see it.

And it hurts so so much  I could not fathom how quickly moving on was for her. You're right, it really makes you question whether they loved you at all and I beat myself up for months and months blaming myself all because I was blamed for the relationship coming to an end the time previously. I did not know what BPD was until the last month or so and unfortunately it was too late and I'd already allowed myself to be recycled. Painful all over again.