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Title: i dont know what to do, i need help Post by: kz09 on April 25, 2017, 11:53:41 AM Hello recently my girlfriend had a bad day and I read a bit about validate and try to apply what I have been learning, I seriously wanted to be there for her, but she tells me I was rude, I do not give importance to things , I seriously try to be understanding, understand how she felt and give her my support and I do not know what I did wrong.
I strive to be able to help her and to be there for her even if it is for messages, because I am in college and I do not live so close to her as to run every time I need it, it is what I would most like and frustrate me can´t be there for her, or do things as I'm supposed to be, I'm still learned skills to deal with that, and I feel like I'm not enough for what she needs, I feel useless and it hurts me so much that I can not help her more efficiently and I do not know what to do. All this affects me in the university because I can not concentrate on classes or do the work, I feel bad and I would like to know what to do in each moment to be the right thing and not make her feel bad because I love her, but I I can´t do things right, no matter how hard I try. Please help Title: Re: i dont know what to do, i need help Post by: Mutt on April 25, 2017, 06:59:05 PM Hi kz09,
*welcome* I'd like to welcome you to bpdfamily. I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling in school because of your r/s. I just want to start off by saying that no one knows what to say exactly at every moment, regardless if your partner suffers from BPD or not. You can use tools, sometimes the tools don't work, you tried. Don't be hard on yourself. You'll find the tools on the right side of the board, can you tell us what the issues are maybe we can help? |