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Title: Introduction Post by: halcyon on April 27, 2017, 03:27:18 PM Hey there. I am a woman engaged to a woman with BPD (and Dissociative). We began dating two years ago, but she was unaware of her disorders at the time. She began having pseudo-seizures after 3 months of dating. She sought treatment then but did catch it "in time", which resulted in a full dissociation that caused her to leave me (just over a year ago). After having disappeared for a month, she returned with a renewed commitment to treatment. Tentatively, we began dating again. After a solid year of full treatment and commitment, I agreed to become engaged (which just happened a month ago). She has not dissociated for a full year, and has only had a few outbursts. And when she does have an outburst, she recovers well (even if it takes a few hours- she eventually gets back on track). On flip side, I have anxiety and panic, which obviously makes this a little more challenging. (I also see a therapist, in addition to attending her sessions as a couple about once a month). For the most part, I am really proud of both of us, and see it as a bit of a miracle that we're doing so well. But of course, a year is still just a year. We are both still new to this, and I know I have a lot left to learn. One thing I struggle with is remaining calm myself when she just can't be, and I'm sure I'll read and talk about that more here as I go. Really glad I found this site and hopeful it can help us maintain what we're building together :)
Title: Re: Introduction Post by: JoeBPD81 on April 28, 2017, 03:33:46 AM Welcome to the family!
Congratulations on the engagement! All relationships are challenging, and you are right to be proud of the good things. The engagement, as all changes, brings about fear and stress, so it was expected to affect you both. It's completelly normal. Being new, it sounds like you have a lot of things "in the right place", and you have a very good attitude about it. If there come worse times, we are here to listen, and brainstorm possible tips, always someone else has been in your shoes and will offer their experience to you. The more you know the more things make sense, and you feel less lost. You can help yourself and help each other. I wish you a lot of happyness. |