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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: JaxWest on May 27, 2017, 08:36:06 PM



Title: Borderlines and work environment?
Post by: JaxWest on May 27, 2017, 08:36:06 PM
Still no contact with BPD... .But, I did hear an interesting story from my coworker. Back when the BPD was in the picture, she would often complain about one of her coworkers. It got to the point that she kind of made it clear if she could set her up to get her in trouble, she would. I had to have an uncomfortable conversation with my boss a few weeks ago, because he had heard rumors and somebody came to him on my behalf about me feeling uneasy around the BPD. I shared some of the information and told him that I know she hates a coworker and would get her in trouble if she could, so I was worried about what she would do around my friends or I. Well, flash forward a few weeks... .The coworker she hates has been moved out of the office and is working remotely for the time being. There was some sort of disagreement and conflict in the office, but I do not know what happened for sure. Maybe coincidence, but I called it a few months ago.

What are BPD's in the workplace? I imagine they would backstab people to get ahead.


Title: Re: Borderlines and work environment?
Post by: Pretty Woman on May 28, 2017, 04:39:04 AM
My ex struggles in the workplace. She is in collections so she shakes people down for payment. Ideally that's a great job for her, to be firm and somewhat verbally assault I've and get paid for it.

Normally she gets "layed off". This time, she works for a private company where the owner is very loyal yet cheap. She doesn't make a good salary for someone her age and career level but she's managed to stay employed.

She is pretty combative with co workers though. People don't really like her.


Title: Re: Borderlines and work environment?
Post by: roberto516 on May 28, 2017, 06:54:56 AM
My ex is a therapist. Here's the kicker. She is so passive with her clients. Doesn't ever call them out on things they are doing wrong, ways to improve, etc. She hates confrontation (makes sense as she doesn't even know how to process her own feelings). But with co-workers, she was always trying to get one over on people. Try to do as less work as possible, if a client was difficult she would have our boss meet with them for the confrontation so she didn't have to.

One story sticks out. When we started dating one of our co-workers friended her ex, also our former coworker, on facebook. He mentioned he was speaking to her ex. She became soo angry and basically bullied him into unfriending him. After I told my boss all about us, and what really occurred in the relationship she said, "She (my ex) was always the most difficult person to supervise).

Last thing about a work environment, because I find it so fascinating in hindsight. She moved to a new work location and absolutely hated her boss. Why did she hate her boss? Because he held her accountable to showing up on time, and not leaving early. He wouldn't let her go out for coffee breaks outside of lunch, etc. So what did she do? Said she had a meeting with him and broke down saying "I don't think I can work here." WHat happened? He eased up his boundaries. Then he was "okay". She didn't hate him anymore. Stunned I didn't see all this before. I used to defend her view about her boss. Truly a child's brain in an adult body.


Title: Re: Borderlines and work environment?
Post by: bus boy on May 28, 2017, 11:42:24 AM
My Xw has problems with many of her coworkers, she calls them thieves, loosers, stund, some she really hates. One coworker of Xw told me he learned years ago how to handle Xw and Xw can't stand him bc he doesn't take her crap, some coworkers of Xw think she is the greatest, these are people she has fooled for years.


Title: Re: Borderlines and work environment?
Post by: JaxWest on May 28, 2017, 08:53:05 PM
I think most of the people in her office are the ones she has fooled. The one that works remotely is the one that she hates. The one day at our party she gave her a dirty look and I thought she was going to attack her coworker. I just don't trust her. If she got that coworker in trouble and she is now upset with my and my coworkers, I think she would do the same. I just think it is too much of a coincidence. Plus, most of the stuff I see about borderline echoes that there is not really any such thing as a coincidence when it comes to BPD and their actions.