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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: JaxWest on May 27, 2017, 08:43:59 PM



Title: Weird question to ask
Post by: JaxWest on May 27, 2017, 08:43:59 PM
So, I bumped into the BPD a couple of weeks ago on campus in the parking lot. It terrified me. I quickly jumped into my car and drove away quickly. One of the things that surprised me was that she had a very rapid weight gain... .I would guess maybe at least 30 pounds since February. That shocked me. I know it is all speculation as to why, but I do know BPD's dip into depression. I have seen a few people gain quick weight from anti-depressants, so I didn't know if maybe that is an explanation. Anybody else notice something similar?


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: Doughboy on May 27, 2017, 10:18:55 PM
No idea on the meds but my uBPDexfiance has probably gained about 15 since the month before she ended things end of March.  I have seen a picture on facebook and I was a little surprised.  Her weight did seem to go up and down a little based on her "mood" during 2 runs of a relationship.

Of course so did mine: 7/25/15 -280.6,  6/10/16 -298, 8/5/16 -273.1, 3/25/17 - 304.  Currently 286.

Stress from the relationship combined with the codependency caused my issue.  Hers has only fone up.  Not that I at any time thought she wasn't beautiful though.


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: Rayban on May 27, 2017, 11:11:36 PM
Eating disorders aren't uncommon for BPDs. My ex is a vegetarian, but she would binge eat on junk food mostly sweets. She would then eat very little for days.


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: JaxWest on May 27, 2017, 11:20:33 PM
Could be an eating disorder. That makes sense. She is a vegetarian as well and runs frequently, so the weight gain came out of nowhere.


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: vaztek2003 on May 28, 2017, 02:59:39 AM
Wow! Just wanted to say that this describes my ex's eating habits



Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: Harley Quinn on May 28, 2017, 04:17:23 AM
Mine too!  I called him a 'sugarholic'.  He could binge eat tons of sweets at night time - literally bags and bags of them and cake too (which I must admit I am a sucker for).  We met at the gym and I train hard, as did he.  About 4 months before we were over he abandoned the gym (as did I for a while out of FOG).  Since we split he lost loads of weight then recently when he put a new profile pic of himself with my replacement I noticed that he's definitely gained weight in his face.  If he's not training his binges will begin to sit on him... .As long as he trains somewhere else if he decides to restart I'll be happy.

Love and light x


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: CorsaG19 on May 28, 2017, 07:50:21 AM
My exBPD was a vegatarian as well. She would just eat veggie pizzas constantly. Ordering them most nights before she moved in. She left 5 weeks ago and i saw her a week ago. We met at the gym. Was trying the 'friend' thing (failed - 5 days NC) She weighed herself and had gained a stone since she left!

I used to joke that she charmed chocolate. She could eat a massive share bar to herself in minutes.

Saying that when she left i was probably the same. Eating very little and then binging on rubbish. Glad ive snapped out of that one now!


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: Rayban on May 28, 2017, 08:37:30 AM
BPD and vegitarianisim ... .interesting.  Now I'm not implying that all BPDs are vegetarians and vive versa, but in my case I believe that part of the reason she was is that it brought her addition attention. Ordering something in a restaurant or being over at someone's home for supper was always 100 questions on how the food was prepared and her saying why she couldn't eat such and such a thing and if they could make something special for her ... .huh what I put up with.


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: Harley Quinn on May 28, 2017, 02:40:44 PM
Wow Rayban,

You've just hit on something.  My ex was so FUSSY with foods that when he first started to eat at my home we had to have a 'no list' which included really odd things he just wouldn't eat and there were things he would never eat together although he'd eat these same foods alone or with other things... .  He wouldn't eat anything we cooked once it had been frozen (even if he'd made it himself), and would only eat anything with veg in if he'd chopped it himself in a certain way.  If something had chunks of veg in that were the wrong size forget it.  Cooking was such a nightmare I just let him do it all in the end and we'd be eating pretty much the same thing every day... .  Never occurred to me it might just be about 'being special and having special dietary requirements' to remain the centre of attention.  Wondered if he was a bit OCD though.   

Love and light x


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: roberto516 on May 28, 2017, 04:39:52 PM
This is too odd. There has to be a link. My ex had anorexia in college. Went to therapy for it. Now for however many years it is she has been a vegetarian.

It's probably the "identity" confusion they struggle with. The "who am I?" Question. Oh that's right, I'm a vegetarian. Etc etc.


Title: Re: Weird question to ask
Post by: JaxWest on May 28, 2017, 08:48:15 PM
Glad to see I am not the only one that noticed odd things like this. Admittedly, I am kind of a picky eater when it comes to veggies, but some of the eating habits she had were weird. She was a "vegetarian", but did not mind if her veggies were cooked with meat. And then hinted that she really did eat meat. But, she was extremely strict on the way they were cooked and prepared. She would order drinks with no ice cubes. Never understood that.