BPDFamily.com

My 18 month long distance relationship with the "love of my life" has again come to a shrieking halt after a world trip to the Caribbean a month ago.
I had just learned from her sister that she was in prison in her 20's, had boyfriends weeks before she met me, lies about everything and is not who she portrays she is, that she drinks at least 1 bottle of wine every night and uses people for everything she can. She claims she is bipolar... her behaviour shows more like Borderline Personality from what I am reading and learning here. So SO crazy!
She has broken up with me at least 4 times prior and I have always been the one reaching out, begging and pleading because "it's always my fault". This time I just accepted the fact that I ruined our trip (with the first class upgrades and the Tiffany necklace gift, the zip lining in St Maarten and everything she wanted). Well all I said was 9 mojitos honey, seriously? and that was enough to set her off. And break up with me.
She owes $150,000 in restitution and cannot get a passport for 50 years. I am an international person and I travel a lot. We took a cruise and she can use her birth certificate because we left from Puerto Rico. She lied about the fact that she applied for a passport too. I am sick sick sick over that. Because I can never take her home to meet my family.

This time I blocked her on Facebook, I deleted her off my phone, I blocked and deleted her off my pinterest and Instagram... .I am done and I do not want her back. She normally is the one who does that and the last time last August she disappeared for 34 days and after I begged and pleaded she came back like nothing happened.
This time she said she wasn't going to block me, but from what I understand she is allowing non friends to see her status updates and today supposedly she put this really sad old lady on who looked really depressed. I am sure it's to make sure I see it so that I can come running and she can nail me.

 I still love her and am taken back by the person she made herself out to be and now I learned all this info because I reached out and friended her family who filled me in. I was never allowed to meet any of her people. She met all my friends. Trust me I asked many times.
so I have mailed her all her stuff she had at my house. We were doing really well before our cruise and now I can never trust her again.
I am going on 2 weeks of non communication. I have left my email open so that I can find out if and when she receives her boxes. Do I say... .anything or just know she received the boxes and then block her?
she still owed=s me $500. I could care less. she usually sends me a check right away but she hasn't.

So, yes I have checked... .I need to stop 100%. I just cannot believe that the love of my life is "this monster". But I have to... .
So please I need help I am addicted to her.
Its getting better. tomorrow starts my 3rd week of no contact. No more peeking no more obsessing. I am training for a 1/2 marathon I am running Saturday. Signing up for a triathlon. Training for a 200 mile relay in august. I am taking excellent care of myself that way... .But I know I need to do more. I am terrified she may reach out. I want to be able to be strong and say no... .Thank you for your honest responses. And thank you for your help. I have learned a lot about her I had no clue about and I am freaking out about the lies.

Hi Apex


That's a lot, good for you for taking care of yourself  |iiii You should be pretty busy with training, I'd suggest to add some resistance training too if it's not already something that you have considered for your training.

You're not going to recycle the r/s if you don't want to, have you set boundaries on yourself if she wants to pursue a romantic r/s?