BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: RedPill on June 22, 2017, 01:38:04 AM



Title: Parenting Plan Questions
Post by: RedPill on June 22, 2017, 01:38:04 AM
I'm crafting a parenting plan or custody schedule for my D15. I currently take care of her 70/30. Not sure what ratio we will end up with but hope for 50/50 or greater with decision making or legal custody.

D15 is gifted athlete and goes straight from school to training. Our school schedule has been:
7:00 - 7:45 I wake D15 up, make breakfast, drive to school.
7:45 - 1:30 School.
1:30 - 2:30 pwBPD picks D15 up from school & drives to training.
2:30 - 8:00 Training.
8:00 - 10:00 I pick up D15 from training and take home, make dinner, help with homework. PwBPD does not participate.

PwBPD and I both have somewhat variable schedules. I work at an event facility and she has various part-time work off and on throughout the day. She often cannot do the mornings or evenings, while I usually cannot do the afternoons. As long as we remain local, is it possible to create a schedule where we continue to do the transport as before regardless of where D15 is staying that day?

Input, suggestions welcome!
-
RP


Title: Re: Parenting Plan Questions
Post by: Panda39 on June 22, 2017, 06:39:59 AM
Sure it's possible and you can suggest it, but if I were you I would have a back up plan.  I have found with my SO's uBPDxw it is best to hope for the best but expect the worst and wherever possible don't rely on her for anything.

Think about what other transportation options are available to your daughter.  Could you enlist the help of another parent?  Could your daughter get there on public transportation?  Could you talk to your boss about changing your schedule?  The good news is your daughter should be able to work on getting her own driver's license soon  |iiii

Panda39


Title: Re: Parenting Plan Questions
Post by: flourdust on June 22, 2017, 07:43:30 AM
Agree with Panda that you should think a little more long-term. You want a parenting plan that will work for the next three years. Fortunately, that's not very long, and D15 will become more independent as she becomes D16 then D17. Her ability to manage her own transportation is valuable, and you should focus the hard rules in your parenting plan on overnights and legal custody issues.