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Title: She saw my BPD books Post by: Caboose on June 28, 2017, 01:48:35 PM My BPgf and I broke up about 6 weeks ago after a pretty intense year and a half long relationship. A week ago she entered my home with her own key without telling me she would be there to return an item I asked her to return. She actually went into my bedroom and place the item on my stack of BP books (I have 5). The top book was Stop Care taking the Borderline or Narcissist How to End the Drama. So, obviously, she saw the books and made a point of letting me know she saw the books. Should I acknowledge receipt of the item? and mention the books? Or?
Title: Re: She saw my BPD books Post by: once removed on June 28, 2017, 01:57:36 PM hi Caboose,
Should I acknowledge receipt of the item? and mention the books? Or? i wouldnt. i would recommend changing your locks though. Title: Re: She saw my BPD books Post by: Caboose on June 28, 2017, 02:35:39 PM Thanks. Its been nearly a week and I haven't, but it's nice to hear someone else say that's the route they would also take. I am quite certain, though, that she will bring it up the next time we discuss the other items in her possession that belong to me. I asked her to bring several things that day, she brought one. We now live in different states - my things are 2,000 miles away and she was here for a week and brought one item.
Title: Re: She saw my BPD books Post by: Lucky Jim on June 28, 2017, 02:43:23 PM Hey Caboose, Why not thank her for return of the item and then impose a boundary, such as, next time I want to be there if and when you enter my apartment again. I don't see why you need to say anything about the books, which are your business. In any event, don't JADE about the books. You're an adult and are free to read anything you like. Plus, you are no longer a couple.
LuckyJim Title: Re: She saw my BPD books Post by: Harley Quinn on June 29, 2017, 05:26:18 PM Hi Caboose,
I'm inclined to agree on changing the locks and also not mentioning the books. If she is diagnosed and aware of herself (?) she will in a lucid moment see that you took enough of an interest in her and your relationship to learn all you can and that's a positive thing. :)on't feel concerned about what she thinks about this. Her thoughts and feelings are likely to change with the wind direction so it's impossible for us to keep up anyway. Regards your other items and the way that she has withheld some, it sounds like she is trying to keep a link open for communication. The same with keeping her key. Are these items essential to you or could you live without them? I've cut my losses with some stuff that I was prepared to let go of, in order to sever the chord. Love and light x |