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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: BowlOfPetunias on August 14, 2017, 09:57:09 AM



Title: Vacation Update
Post by: BowlOfPetunias on August 14, 2017, 09:57:09 AM
Recap:  My wife invited a friend's mother to stay at our hotel on during our family vacation without asking me beforehand.  She was supposed to text her to try to cancel if she had not already bought the plane ticket.  She then found a hotel for the other woman for SOME of the trip, but she would still be staying with us one night.

This weekend, my wife tells me that this woman won't be able to make it because she could not afford a flight!  I reminded her that she was supposed to text her that it was off UNLESS she had ALREADY bought the ticket.  Her only excuses were something about not getting to it right away and not knowing what to say.  She admitted that it was wrong not to have followed through on her promise.  But again, not taking responsibility for her actions (not doing something awkward to get out of the awkward situation that she created) and not doing what she promised.



Title: Re: Vacation Update
Post by: Tattered Heart on August 14, 2017, 10:43:39 AM
Sorry to hear she didn't follow through. I know my H hates to have to back pedal on things. I think he gets embarrassed or worried what other people will say to him. It's also a part of not having good boundaries--an inability to say no to others for fear of them rejecting him.

Although the conversation is over, if it comes up again, using SET can you think of ways to talk to her about taking responsibility for her actions.