BPDFamily.com

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Although she's never been screened (and we are taking on board this site's recommendation that WE not broach this subject with her without careful preparation, if then), our adult daughter displays almost all of the traits used to diagnose BPD (7 out of 9, when 5 is apparently sufficient for diagnosis).  As helpful as this site is, I think my husband and I both need pragmatic, ongoing help coming up with coping strategies that unite, not divide us as a couple; and nurturing strategies that will help our daughter find her own path to healing.

I've met some very lovely, caring, talented therapists through online searches of therapy clearing houses here in the UK, using BPD or CBT as a filter  -- but when you get into their office it turns out their actual practice and experience is NOT really BPD... .and not about providing pragmatic advice and feedback on dealing with our very specific situation.

I'm quite comfortable dealing with concepts around mental illness / counselling; my husband, not so much. But he has slowly come to see that his beloved, adoring/abusive, tortured/torturing child has an illness that MAY be treatable. And he's now willing, indeed eager, to start having sessions with the right kind of expert -- but this ongoing auditioning process is proving expensive and time-consuming! 

If anyone in the UK can recommend a therapist... .if the administrators of this site have any database of London-based counselors familiar with the concepts and latest thinking on BPD as shown on this site ... .I'd greatly appreciate that information.

We can communicate via this message board about how to pass that info along via a private channel, if confidentiality is an issue.

Many thanks. Just reading some of the content on this site is balm to the soul.

Hello Boundaree

Welcome to bpdfamily 

I’m glad you found us and reached out for support.  I too have researched therapists specialising in BPD in London (2 years ago) through searching on line like you - though I never enquired further as I was looking for those practicing and qualified in in DBT for my 29DD - they work as a team in practices, not alone.

I have two recommendations you may find helpful to speak with, qualified in the treatment of BPD:

While on the NHS waiting list my DD attended one DBT module at Mind re-framed located at Kings Cross, the Director there is very helpful https://www.mind-reframed.com/london-psychological-services. They may be able to provide you the support you and your husband seek, or point you in the right direction. I found them affordable in comparison to the few other private DBT practices there are in London. Have you come across them?

The Dr that diagnosed my DD (2 years ago) and led the DBT team at our local NHS mental health centre has since moved into private practice ... .to The Chelsea Psychology Clinic.

I hope this is helpful if you follow up. As you’ll read here there are other therapies for the treatment of BPD, my DD chose DBT so our knowledge lies there.

How’s your daughter coping, does she talk to you at all about her struggles?

WDx

Hi Boundaree

To add to the recommendations made by Wendydarling I think it's also worth exploring Schema therapy which was developed to treat personality disorders.

It has a good track record with BPD and there are some really good Schema therapist based in London

The better qualified and more experienced ones tend to be expensive - though quite a few of these work in NHS practices too.

It's worth checking out this website for UK and London based Schema therapists

https://www.schematherapysociety.org/Search

I would recommend the following practice.

www.schematherapyassociates.com

Good luck

Reforming

Dear Wendydarling and Reforming, thank you so much for those recommendations! We will follow up - will keep you posted!