BPDFamily.com

Hired my lawyer today. I'm feeling better, and I'm feeling confident that I'll be able to work effectively with me, and I believe he will fight for me.

He didn't fill me with empty promises, and he cautioned me on a few things, but, overall, I am feeling positive about my own personal life.

On the other hand, there is Las Vegas. My heart goes out to everyone affected by the shooting. And now I heard Tom Petty died.

Makes me sad.

TMD

Yes, very bad news about Las Vegas shooting.  I preach that we have a mental health crisis in America.  Thoughts and prayers for everyone.

Back on topic.  Congrats.  I know it is very hard to get to the decision to hire a lawyer and make a big step towards what will be a bumpy ride, but, forward we must go.   I've gotten out the phone number of the lawyer I intend to choose several times now, but, I tuck it back away for a little longer. 

I think it's good to get cautionary advice from your lawyer.  Regardless, you're moving ahead, and that's good. 
Godspeed.

An attorney can certainly give you peace of mind knowing he/she "will take care of you." Those were my attorney's words as I walked out of his office after paying my initial retainer. 

My wife's attorney asked for "status quo", meaning I needed to continue paying my portion of the household bills as I always have. However, after about a month my wife attempted to have me removed from our house. I spoke to my attorney and told him I simply couldn't afford to pay all the biggest household bills and also be thrown out on the street and have to get an appartment, furniture and set up utilities, etc. My attorney responded to me with, "yeah there is just so much money". He went to bat for me on that.

I do suggest you communicate with your attorney about any concerns or ideas for your defense. You never know what might be helpful to him/her in helping you.

Also keep notes of everything going on. I have 2 notebooks. One is filled with notes I jotted down when I thought of something that might help my attorney. The other notebook is a daily journal I keep notes in, such as what nasty things my wife said in passing, etc. And I sleep with my notebooks in a backpack! Prying eyes will want to see what you're writing. Both my daughters have acted as spys for my wife. It's horrible dealing with that but you must with a BPD partner and grown BPD daughter in the mix. It's Crazytown.

Just some suggestions that might help. 

   

I keep a journal online in a protected Dropbox account (free).  Always accessible and backed up - not to mention searchable for when you needs legal notes. FWIW.

I gained insight from my divorce lawyer regarding disasters, though only loosely applicable here... .  When I was a new member here in 2006 I was awaiting the court hearing to set the divorce's temp order when a small tornado ripped through the area where I suspected my ex lived or was visiting.  It was during the 3 months that my ex was blocking all father-son contact, even phone calls.  I called my lawyer's emergency number and said I was on edge because I couldn't verify my son was okay, I was anxious to rush to court for emergency action.  What he said shocked me.  He said the court wouldn't care and could see me as a bit crazy.  He said statistically my son was more in danger riding in vehicles than from a tornado and that would be the court's perspective.

So while tornadoes, hurricanes, airplane crashes and yes, mass shootings, grab the public's attention and shock, statistically there are more dangerous, but everyday, categories of risk out there.