BPDFamily.com

Hi there,
My story is pretty simple. I am with a diagnosed BPD that is also an alcoholic. So my life is pretty much a roller coaster and walking on egg shells daily... .I know some BPD only have a couple of the criterias. Mine has all of them and to the extreme. Many will ask why I wont leave. Simple her and my children are involved. I love her and them. But I see that i'm slowly losing myself.  Hoping that this community will be of help for me to figure out how to move forward with or without the relationship and if needed how to get out of it without serious mental or physical damage done. I sometimes feel i'm the one that is going crazy. if that makes sense.

Welcome *welcome*,

I'm sorry to hear that things are so up and down in your relationship. You've found a great place for support and help. The awesome thing about roller coasters is that you can get off the ride when you choose to do so. Are you ready to get off the ride?
It takes a lot of work on your part and a lot of not focusing so much on your partner and focusing more on you.

We have a saying around here: Before you can make things better, you have t  stop making it worse  (https://bpdfamily.com/content/ending-conflict). Us nons have created negative patterns of responding to our pwBPD. When we can remove those negative responses (such as walking on egg shells, codependency, JADEing, etc.) then we can start to gain some equilibrium in ourselves and our pwBPD doesn't throw us off as easily.

What would you say is the biggest issue you have difficulty with right now?

Alcoholism, BPD, and kids in the mix. You definitely don't have it easy, guy.  

We have a good set of info located on the right side of this page -- look at the "What is the first step?" and "Lessons" sections to maybe start to organize your thoughts.

What's going on right now that's your biggest challenge?

Jinx! 

Pinch poke you owe me a coke.  :)