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Title: She message me out of the blue Post by: flash101 on January 05, 2018, 03:00:24 PM It's been a while. I think I'm doing well now that I've been NC with her for more than 2 months. Yesterday, she message me out of the blue saying she knows about the current girl I am spending time with, misspelled the girl's name a lot, and she's not mad. She repeated that she's not mad on that message twice, said goodbye stating this will be her last message to me then proceed to block me again cause I am unable to reply with just OK.
Is this expected from them? I mean she acts like I don't exist on this earth and proceed to block me on social media before and started cutting off communications then all of the sudden messaging to say goodbye then cutoff communications again? I don't know what she's expecting from that and she's clearly stalked my Instagram prior to that message to find out about the girl. I just don't want my ex bothering her. What you guys think? Title: Re: She message me out of the blue Post by: getfree on January 05, 2018, 04:01:52 PM Whilst I never experienced this myself (although there was about 2 months of frantic attempts to win me back after she discarded me) I think this is a fairly typical case of a recycle attempt.
She knows that you are with someone else and might be moving on so she send a "last" contact and blocks you in the hope that you will chase after her. She almost certainly feels invalidated that you are moving on and is hoping that her "abandoning" you will cause her to chase. This makes sense to her because that is exactly what she assumes that the fear of abandonment drives everyone the same way it drives pwBPD. I would take a sigh of relief at the fact she has blocked you and get on with your life including enjoying your new dating/friendship opportunities. |iiii Title: Re: She message me out of the blue Post by: mjssmom on January 13, 2018, 06:29:59 PM I agree with get free. The message is meant to provoke some feelings of nostalgia in you and get you to chase her. My exBPDbf periodically does this. The best response is no response. If you truly want her to give up don't respond. It could take her quite a long time though to get the hint. They don't respond to boundaries that well has been my experience. I've never responded to my ex yet he tries and he also know that I'm in a serious relationship.
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