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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: rarsweet on January 12, 2018, 10:11:13 PM



Title: Termination of Parental Rights (TPR)
Post by: rarsweet on January 12, 2018, 10:11:13 PM
In a few more weeks it will be 2 years since ex had contact. Daughter is 3 and a half now. Last month he hit 10k behind in support and has never paid anything. He has still not given me, court, or child support agency any mailing address for him. The last thing I heard about him, from his father, was that his truck was impounded last month after he had it sitting at a friends house for a year and a half and the new building owner got it towed away, no registration, inspection, not on the apartment lease. He hasn't spoken to any of his family since July 2016, daughter and I see his father and sister regularly. Last month his brother and niece and nephew came to visit from Alaska. He hasn't seen them since 2012. There was no effort to see them while they were out here. His side of the family had formal pictures done and daughter was included in them. His family and I get along great now and I hope they are always in daughter's life. But, I am at a point where I realize he is never going to be in the picture. According to my state law he is at a felony level of non support. He has met the standard for abandonment, 6 months of no contact and/or 12 months of non support. (It's been 2 years in February). As our last court order stands I have sole physical custody and he would have to do supervised visits before he could any real time with her. I have sole medical decision making, but otherwise we have shared legal custody. I can't even get her a passport to take a cruise. In this state I would have to get married and have a step-parent willing to adopt her to terminate his rights. I know I will never get support from him and couldn't care less. I have been thinking more and more that I would like to change her last name to mine. Has anyone been through a TPR with their kiddos or know someone who has. At this point I feel like we are stunted by the standing shared legal custody order and can't even get him served with a motion to modify it as I haven't had an address for him in 2 years. Are there states that are more willing to TPR without a step-parent present. I have no intention of marrying, or even dating for that matter.


Title: Re: TPR?
Post by: Turkish on January 12, 2018, 11:44:39 PM
I suppose you can't move out of state either? Can you move out of the county if you wanted to? We're stuck where we filed,  short of modification.  If you turn him in for the felony,  would a bench warrant be issued? That might eventually catch him. 

It is good news that you are both embraced by the family though  :)


Title: Re: Termination of Parental Rights (TPR)
Post by: rarsweet on January 14, 2018, 10:48:40 AM
The only stipulation about moving is that I give him 30 days notice. His last address on file from 2 years ago isn't valid. I have returned mail I sent him over a 6 month period and the emails from Division of child support stating that he isn't at that address and that they cannot do anything to enforce the order without a physical address for him. Apparently he needs to be served with intent to enforce in order to do anything, like criminal charges, revocation of license, etc. The support order is that his wages are garnished, he hasn't had a job that his wages can be garnished from. I had heard about 3 jobs he got in the surrounding area, but once I notified DCS he either quit or got fired before the garnishment process could go through. He has literally never paid anything. So, basically I can move out of state if I want since I can't even mail him notice. I can't move out of the country or even travel out of it because I can't get daughter a passport. As the order stands we have joint legal custody except me having sole medical. I need his signature to get her a passport. One would think that child support agency would do more to try to track him down, but they don't. I really could care less, but I don't want the next 15 years to be limited by the standing order. I had a religious preschool here refuse to let her be enrolled because they stated that he would have to sign off to enroll her since it was a private religious school, not public. I am afraid that at some point we would need passports to even fly domestically and be limited from doing that. My thought is that if I move and live somewhere 6 months I could motion to change jurisdiction and try to get the order changed there.