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Title: This too has passed Post by: itgetsbetter94 on January 24, 2018, 04:15:59 PM Finally. I'm finally over him.
It got better. :) My magic formula: reaching out for help (friends, family, psychiatrist, priest) + prayer + conscious decision to heal + passing of time. I cannot say I'm 100% healed, but I'm 80% healed. The thought of him doesn't trigger the emotional response in me any longer. I know he got engaged. He can be happy for all I care. The though of him being happy with someone else doesn't bother me anymore. I'm letting him go. I'm setting myself free. I met a guy. Maybe it will work out, maybe it won't. I'm taking baby steps this time. I just wanted to post this here, as an ending to my story. My agony laster for 4.5 months, and we were in r/s for 2 months. I don't ever want to cross path with someone from cluster B. I will be able to recognize them now, though. This experience changed me in a way that it took off my pink Disney-esque love- conquers-all glasses. I still believe in love, but I cannot be fooled again into the love scam. Only healthy love from now for me please! I'm wishing you all the best of luck in your recovery from this madness. There is a way out and the pain is the way out! Find a good therapist, pray a lot, talk to your friends, write in your journal, have faith that things will change for the better. As J.K.Rowling wrote in the last sentence of Harry Potter- "all was well." Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: happendtome on January 25, 2018, 02:54:28 AM Im glad that you worked out this. You did it very quickly and my suggestion for you would be that you wouldnt rush, but only you know where you stand at the moment.
Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: gotbushels on January 25, 2018, 07:52:34 AM Finally. I'm finally over him. Plain fantastic. :)It got better. :) My magic formula: reaching out for help (friends, family, psychiatrist, priest) + prayer + conscious decision to heal + passing of time. I cannot say I'm 100% healed, but I'm 80% healed. The thought of him doesn't trigger the emotional response in me any longer. Thank you for sharing itgetsbetter94. Good luck on your journey and I hope you find peace. Please do drop in from time to time, many people can use what you learned to get through their own difficult times after their relationship. Sometimes too, learning can happen for months following the relationship with the pwBPD. :) Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: heartandwhole on January 27, 2018, 08:04:23 AM Great news, itgetsbetter94! I love these kinds of posts. We need hope and positivity here, too.
Happy for you. I hope you'll stick around and share your wisdom with others... .:) heartandwhole Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: EdR on January 27, 2018, 03:13:50 PM Hi itgetsbetter!
I am really happy for you and wish you all the best! I really hope I will be able to feel the same way soon. However, I am sad to say I doubt that... Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: gotbushels on January 29, 2018, 09:03:59 AM I really hope I will be able to feel the same way soon. However, I am sad to say I doubt that... A lot of us here have doubts through each of our journeys EdR. I encourage you with self-compassion to give yourself the time. Keep on walking--it gets better. :)Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: Turkish on January 30, 2018, 12:41:44 AM I remember the night I chose my path. I had experienced the push after one real date, after a couple of months of "friend dating." I was mad. Then that night I got the text, "I'm going to see [movie] do you want to meet me?" It would have been ok for me to politely decline and see her as a peer in the volunteer program we were in.
I was angry, then thought, I should "give love a chance." It wasn't love, it was need, on both of our parts. I don't want to repeat this. Congratulations to you for moving on. Like heartandwhole, I also wish you stick around and share your healing journey with others. :) Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: heartandwhole on January 31, 2018, 03:49:34 AM It wasn't love, it was need, on both of our parts. I don't want to repeat this. Totally resonate with that, Turkish, thank you for expressing it so well. Title: Re: This too has passed Post by: pearlsw on February 01, 2018, 06:39:48 PM Only healthy love from now for me please! I hear ya on that one! I prefer to stay single a good long time, but in any case only healthy stuff in my life when/if this ends! You aren't going away are ya? Your insights could be of help to others - hope we see around here/giving back! |