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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Darkblaez on April 09, 2018, 09:25:31 PM



Title: Mirroring Ex?
Post by: Darkblaez on April 09, 2018, 09:25:31 PM
Question I have, do BPD mirror the ex? I ask because I noticed this on my Facebook. My BPDex is not connected to my FB as a friend or anything. Yet she has decided to follow my public post. She never had any photos of the two Rots she took when she discarded me. Yet after I post pics of my Belgian Malinois the very same day she post photos of the Rots and starts creating cute comments about them. Then I post a photo of me with my Belgian and within an hour she post a photo of her with each. I post a few photos of him playing frisbee with me, she follows up with photos of her playing with the Rots. Keep in mind I am not following her on FB (as in the FB mechanism to follow someone), I am just merely glancing to see what got posted.

A few days goes by and she starts commenting and liking photos I post, of which I'm not concerned with and assume it's to get my attention?

But with her doing the photo posting in close sequence to what my post were, same content, etc. Is this a form of Mirroring? If so (or not) why if I am suppose to be the ex? and if not, then what is it?

Again thanks in advance, this one has me stumped... .

-Darkblaez


Title: Re: Mirroring Ex?
Post by: Speck on April 09, 2018, 09:48:59 PM
Hello, Darkblaez:

Is this a form of Mirroring?

It could be.

If so (or not) why if I am suppose to be the ex?

The hallmark mirroring, chameleon-like, behavior of pwBPD happens typically to pull one into their sphere. From my understanding, pwBPD have a hard time with self-identity and mirror everyone around them. Maybe she doesn't want you to remain an ex. Maybe she's trying to flatter you in order to recycle you... .or at the very least, keep you in her orbit.

... .and if not, then what is it?

I cannot think of anything her recent FB behavior would be other than her trying to get your attention, thereby, keeping you in her orbit.

Once upon a time, there were two modes of communication: Verbal and nonverbal.

Now, there's Facebook.


-Speck


Title: Re: Mirroring Ex?
Post by: Harley Quinn on April 11, 2018, 08:58:46 AM
Hi Darkblaez,

How long have you been broken up and is this the only time you've split up during the r/s?  I think you can safely say that she is seeking your attention.  There could be a number of reasons.  Most importantly, how did you feel when she did these things and what do you want to do as a result?

Love and light x