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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: juju2 on April 01, 2018, 10:22:30 PM



Title: 90 minutes per week
Post by: juju2 on April 01, 2018, 10:22:30 PM
Hi family,

It's not my imagination.


My pwBPD believes I had a relapse, i am codependent.   He told this to a mutual friend, who told me.

So, long story, we are separated since march 2017.

Since October, he has limited contact w me to 90 minutes per week, be it in person or phone.

I remember when his dtr was on rehab, we could only visit 90 mins per week, on Saturdays.

I don't know what all of this means, I do know I was toxic, too much dealing w him, and i did get into a very bad place.  Mentally, physically.

Plus I didn't know about BPD, and i didnt know any tools.

Just sharing.

I am doing so much better family.


This is a healing place.

juju


Title: 90 minutes per week
Post by: RolandOfEld on April 02, 2018, 02:37:00 AM
Thanks for the update, juju! Glad to hear you are doing better.

How was the separation initiated?

~ROE



Title: 90 minutes per week
Post by: CryWolf on April 02, 2018, 03:28:24 AM
no one is perfect. glad you are learning and improving.


Title: 90 minutes per week
Post by: blooming on April 02, 2018, 03:39:02 AM
I'm glad you're doing better Juju, keep it up!


Title: 90 minutes per week
Post by: juju2 on April 03, 2018, 12:25:10 AM
Hi

The separation was initiated by both of us, I thought we were going to work on ourselves.

We were both very toxic and unhappy, end of 2016.
I am the one who got it rolling, and because of that, he said i kicked him out... .That's not how i remember it.  I could be wrong.

Long story, he then chose to start dating others, he told me last week, he is in a r/s.  Anyway, am not doing any chasing behaviours. 

Do not know what is going on, frankly.

Guess being in a r/s w BPD is full of uncertainty.

And I have heard here you need to be strong emotionally to be in r/s w BPD.

Sometimes it gets old always giving.  I want someone I can rely on.

If only I had more wisdom, before I got emotionally involved. 

What I have learned, through this last year, is to have a great life, with or without any one person.

Ultimately, for me, that shows me I am getting healthy.

Thank you for letting me share,
juju