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My experience is that when the people i am associated see a psychic or spiritual healer the results seem markedly better. The exact reasons are of course of interest, I was wondering how many others shared this experience, and if they might offer any reasons (pros and cons ) for this.

I have my own suspicions but am looking for feedback without biasing the results, your input would be much appreciated,

p.s. my step daughter is a bit bumpy at the moment and had been to see the dr and talked about seeing a(nother) psychologist with them.I mentioned a psychic and she immediately perked up, and found a pcychic her mother saw, and happily went off to see her.

regards all and good luck.

I guess if you want to purchase validation from a stranger with no/little discernment on the imapct of what one is actually validating... .one can go to a psychic? Now... .does that actually benefit someone with BPD?  I suppose we need to see the research on it, right? Can it make someone feel good in the moment? Sure... .just as swimming can, tanning in the sun for vit D, etc. So because the treatment outcome for psychologists in benefitting persons with BPD is low... .does that default that tanning is the better method of treatment for BPD? I think no. Can it make someone feel good in the moment? Maybe Can it make someone feel good or behave better over the course of a year? I wont say it is impossible.  

I suppose I just am not seeing what this topic actually is about.

Without the research on either BPD and psychology vs BPD and psychic healing offered, I simply cannot even discuss this. Maybe we discuss how the color of our walls impact our mood and our BPD partner. Maybe I would need to find stats on that too.  (Likely there are general stats... .maybe not BPD related ones tho).  Mybe you are seeking free validation via asking this but not sharing your thoughts. Why not ask the psychic her thoughts? Seriously... .why not?

the healer was good,
SD came back feeling good, she was close to ditching job but got the vibe she might hold back on that for 12 months after talking to her this am,

And she said she wanted to give up alcohol and marujiana ( heard that before )
but overall a much better result than a psychologist would have ended up with,
she is very jaded by them and it would have been same old with no feeling better.


i know it is voodoo but voodoo works with BPD feeling=fact

p.s. i am not an advocate of random validation, though i notice a lot of it on this forum,
selected validation and re-enforcing positive values is another thing though.

Hi SlyQQ

I'm glad your loved one is finding help with psychic, spiritual healer. Interestingly, my daughter has considered her DBT experience likewise, it's been life changing for her, she engaged with the best of professionals, she was queen of avoidance, done that, you know that well.

SlyQQ are you hanging in with us, what us parents learn here  |---> C<|||

WDx

My apologies
I was in poor form
Am personally struggling in my own trauma therapy and lots has been stirred.  It has been challenging to behave lately so apologies for being a wise ass.

Hi slyqq

For my son, he’d jump at the chance. For him, he looks for different experiences in life. It’s the stimulation that he craves.

Call it vulnerableness, stupidity or open mindedness  - any new idea he’d be on it - is on it.

His anxiety is high most of the time, stimulation (whether it’s experential or consequential) is what he learns from. Sadly, addiction issues are there now.

He had a few DBT sessions at the beginning and it felt like hard work. There has to be motivation to change. Even if he felt that he’d be cured (knew the “truth”) the persistency, consistency of effort on his part required would be beyond his ability. That’s my belief currently. It doesn’t mean to say he won’t seek treatment at some point though.

I don’t know about statistics. I’m not interested.

For me, it’s about MY SON finding out what works for himself. It’s his responsibility. I’ll emotionslly support him, not judging, when he asks.

We’re all here trying to find our own path.  Seeking quick fixes.  As the saying goes, humans seeks the path of least resistance. 

LP

Thanks Lolipop, Sd is normal BPD, hospitalizations, suicides attempts, brief bout of meth (but moved on thank god ), marijuana and alcohol overuse,seen a dozen perhaps more psychologists, two "teams " and three or four psychiatrists,

the med system has been good for a safehaven when completely off the rails, but Sd has no time for them any more,

trick has always been finding, someone/something she can believe in for good advice,

psychologists no longer, ( if ever ) fit the bill for her.

Hi SlyQQ,

I don’t know whether this will be of any help to you but during my last therapy session my counsellor suggested that I google “unconditional positive regard” by Carl Rogers, which I did. It turns out that he was a humanistic psychologist. Just thought I’d mention it in case, like me, you’re unaware of humanistic psychology and you might like to take a look at it x

Thanks feeling better, looks like fertile ground,

Sd needs to find a "self" she can relate to an respect, that is ironically non existenial,

my own beliefs in genetic diversity and everything and everyone has a purpose

(in a beyond good and evil way ) also seem to gel  with this, a lot of food for thought.

Hi sly

 
My son found a sense of self through his work. He’s found a job that meets his physical and mental needs. It took 5 years for him to build this confidence in his working life. A compartment existence that now rolls over into his personal life.  Whereas before, his personal life rolled into his working life (I.e purposeless and drugs).

This didn’t happen until I stopped trying to fix and enable with financial support.  He now has a sense of self but still struggles with relationships. I believe that, until he has a deep and meaningful relationship with a partner,  he’ll struggle. He nheeds another deep relationship with somebody else than me and so my distancing is part of my approach. It’s a challenging balancing act as he still needs emotional support.

The more I learn is that BPD is about relationships. That’s my unprofessional view.

LP

My own view Lolipop that a close emotional relationship is toxic for someone with BPD,

the closer the relationship the more stress and likelihood of dysregulation occuring,

M linehan could not seem to manage that feat, though she has an adopted daughter,

Just wondering, have you or your SD read the book The Buddha and the Borderline by Kiera van Gelder? If not I can recommend it. It charts her recovery from BPD through meditation and dbt x

Her mother was a reasonable advocate of the budhist philosophy

and yes whatever works at the time , or they can make themselves believe in,

hopefully, eventually they can find one answer and stick to it rather than there

unfortunate propensity to be forever bouncing around.

Hi SlyQQ,
An interesting post.
All of us are different and respond accordingly. My take on your comment/question is that a combination of support can work very well together as long as the person is open to it. For example, a good analyst can help one to explore the core of why one would be in a relationship with a person with BPD or traits, while a  spiritual ritual for  healing or protection can provide another dimension of support at a time of emotional crisis. 
Zen606