BPDFamily.com

Hello all... .sorry I haven't posted in months or been around, but I've been taking full time college classes.  WHEW.  Semester finally over!

So, here's my question:

Has anyone else had a BPD loved one explode with dysregulation in the morning... .and then they go right back to bed to sleep some more? 

My wife did this today, and it was not the first time.  And, personally, I find it ODD.  Not the dysregulation part.  I am accustomed to that.  What I find so strange is that she is able to turn right back around and go back to sleep in a matter of five minutes.

I am not BPD myself, but I do have generalized anxiety disorder.  And I know that when my emotions are super charged up, the very LAST thing I can do is sleep.  I am nearly jealous of her ability to do this, to be honest.

Here's the "kicker": she also suffers from dissociative identity disorder (and of course PTSD).  So I am constantly worried that the so-called "dysregulation" is actually a dissociative episode. 

To be fair to her, there IS a lot going on in our lives right now.  She just quit her job a couple of weeks ago and she was the only wage earner in the house (since I go to school full time).  Now she's decided to go back to school in the Fall too, which means we have to sell our home and move into a cheaper one.  She's got a new job lined up, but she hasn't started yet, so no money coming in yet- and I know that's a big stressor. 

What really sucks is, she has now missed her therapy appointment for today because of this.  And I can't help thinking she needed it now more than ever, so... .another worry.  (Then again, I do have GAD, so I worry about EVERYTHING. )

One thing I've noticed: this only happens on mornings when she is having trouble getting up and I have to resort to shaking her awake.  So, I have decided to STOP shaking her awake.  As her wife, it's not up to me to get her out of bed anyway.  She is a grown adult.  If she sleeps in and misses something important, that should be on her- not on me.  So I'm releasing myself of this responsibility here and now.  That is ONE action I can take to relieve the issue.

But I'm REALLY curious to know if any of you have experienced the going right back to bed and sleeping part, because that's what has me stumped.  Can they really turn it on and off that fast?  All those emotions that are charged up?

Good on you to stop waking her up. My wife gets real angry if awakened.

Not necessarily in the morning , but I've seen her going quickly from disregulated to calm. I've been excoriated by my wife one moment and seen her quickly transition to a more calm state and ask me why i was still holding onto the fight... .it was over. 

Hi halcyon   

I think depending on the individual--strong emotion can arise seemingly out of nowhere and ramp up very quickly. I recall one time when my ex woke up into a highly dysregulated state.

my BPDbf has very recently started being like this in the morning... .he will wake up very early and if i don't  get up and stay up with him then it is a huge dysregulation and i am painted completely black he will say the meanest things because i want to sleep in on my only day off... .or i will say something completely normal and not attacking and he goes into a full on rage

i suspected it was because he was taking xanax the night before and it may have a negative effect on him but now im not so sure if that's it... .his splitting has become quite frequent

since she has just woken up, dissacoaitve goes way up in probability, might even be sleep walking

does she remember it?