|
Title: It will never change Post by: RushFan2112 on May 16, 2018, 12:17:25 AM It won't change. The abuse and manipulation will just continue to manifest itself in different ways. I'll always 'not hear' him correctly, I'll always not love him enough, I'll always be to blame, I'll always betray him, and so on and so on... .
Someone just tell me it will never ever change... .because that sick part of me still wants to have hope it will. Title: Re: It will never change Post by: Turkish on May 16, 2018, 12:23:24 AM What's going on RushFan2112?
What is the abuse and manipulation? Loving a pwBPD is certainly tough. Are you broken up? T Title: Re: It will never change Post by: Lucky Jim on May 16, 2018, 10:24:26 AM Excerpt Someone just tell me it will never ever change... .because that sick part of me still wants to have hope it will. Hey RF212, Welcome! What makes you suspect that your Ex has BPD? Fill us in, when you can. It's normal to hope that things will work out in a BPD r/s, but it usually doesn't play out that way. Only you know when it's time to get off the roller coaster. LuckyJim Title: Re: It will never change Post by: RushFan2112 on May 16, 2018, 01:45:15 PM Yes, he's BPD. Kind of in denial, kind of in acceptance. He's a splitter. The daily yo-yo. I think he truly believes it will never be over. I don't blame him. I've allowed him to trample over any boundary I've set. I'll never trust him to be consistent with anything-especially his affection.
I KNOW everything. I see all the patterns. I've been researching BPD for at least a year, prior to his diagnosis. I know I can't save him. I know I know I know. I'm not stupid... .but damn if he didn't completely f up my head. You can't explain this to someone that's never been through it. Just just treat you like you're crazy. Title: Re: It will never change Post by: Turkish on May 16, 2018, 11:31:46 PM So you are still in the r/s? Are you living together?
You have been researching BPD. A lot of the material here has been developed from the experts in BPD, you may have come across it. We have feature articles such as this on boundaries: https://bpdfamily.com/content/setting-boundaries Are you accused of cheating? A pwBPD at their core feels shame and not only unloved, but they feel that they don't deserve love. This is hard to deal with to say the least What are your thoughts about going forward on this r/s given that you said that you can't rescue him? |