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Title: My friends are urging me to get out Post by: Hope?83 on June 18, 2018, 03:50:19 PM Hi. I haven’t been in a chat room in many years. I’m hoping to connect with people who can understand what I’m going through. I’m 17 weeks pregnant and the father of my child has BPD. After a disastrous week of what was supposed to be a vacation near where I grew up, I finally broke down and told some longtime friends about what I’ve been experiencing the last 18 months. They are all urging me to get out and they are worried about me (as is my mother). I’m worried too. If I wasn’t pregnant I would just leave but I am now bonded to this person for life.
Title: Re: My friends are urging me to get out Post by: pearlsw on June 20, 2018, 09:15:34 AM Hi Hope?83,
*welcome* Sorry I hadn't seen this sooner. How are you doing? We're here! You feel like you have to stay with him because of the pregnancy? Well, you are bonded, yes, but please don't feel like you have to stay. I can imagine the strong pull you have towards him, but you do have choices, okay? Hard as they may be. Are you and the baby safe? Is he violent? What behaviors does he exhibit? Do you live together? What has said about you/the pregnancy? wishing you the best, pearl. Title: Re: My friends are urging me to get out Post by: flourdust on June 20, 2018, 10:51:09 AM Just jumping in to welcome you, too! Pearl has some great thoughts.
Your friends want you to leave him. You feel obligated to stay. But what do you want, and why? Title: Re: My friends are urging me to get out Post by: Cat Familiar on June 20, 2018, 03:19:39 PM People who care about you see the situation differently than those who are immersed in it. Yes, you are pregnant, but that doesn't mean you have to stay with him if you don't want to.
And think about your child. Would you want your child to be parented by someone who is unreliable and unstable? Please tell us more about what leads you to realize that this man has BPD. Title: Re: My friends are urging me to get out Post by: Radcliff on June 20, 2018, 11:59:58 PM Can you tell us a little more about your relationship? How long have you been together?
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