BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Forearmed on June 19, 2018, 01:02:40 PM



Title: When your BPD just wouldn't give a straight answer...why, IYOs?
Post by: Forearmed on June 19, 2018, 01:02:40 PM
All those reasonable chances given after we split due to her enmeshment issues : ):

'If you can't talk right now, just say - it's no problem... .' (ignores for days then complains you send too many texts ; ) #stalkersetup

'If you're out there dabbling [with others] just say, it's no issue... .' (genuinely, as you were ready to move on anyway).

Her: I've been working hard / busy / I'm drained / my eyes are bad / I thought it was easier just to ignore /  I  hadn't turned on my phone (after 4 days, ).

Never a straight answer if they haven't quite sorted out a new person. The BS got so pathetic I just had to tell her (in no uncertain terms !) how bloody childish she was is and i actually pitied  how she was at nearly 51 years old. i.e. She still harbours fantasies of the perfect relationship, but a maturely discussing anything that is her fault is avoided when she devalues you enough... !)

What say some of you... .? : )

This was a waif version (and I have an ex i live with - no intimacy, btw - which didn't help). But seeing how the devaluation process played out in almost covert abusive fashion... .never again with any BPD.

As soon as the red flags come up I'm leaving. Simple, .