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I've been thinking about anxiety a lot the past few days (probably because I'm experiencing more of it at the moment) and thinking it might be a good topic to dialogue on.  I need to dust off my "toolbox" and would love to add some more tools to it. 

I think that the most challenging part of detaching for me was not allowing myself to act out in an effort to relieve my anxiety.  I would find myself feeling anxious and my knee jerk reaction was to engage with dBPDxh or rehash the latest engagement over and over in my mind trying to figure it out.  Definitely NOT productive if my goal is detachment.

So how do you deal with anxiety in a more productive way?  Here are some things that I have found helpful.  I'd love to hear what works for you guys.

-Physical activity, especially outdoors.  This seems to dial down the volume of my thoughts and defuse the nervous energy.
-Learning something new.  It takes mental focus to learn, and leaves less space for endless rumination.
-Music.  I have a tendency to sing at the top of my lungs, but even just listening to music can focus/refocus my thoughts.
-Drugs. THE LEGAL KIND.  :)  I have done my stint(s) on anti-anxiety pills.  They definitely take the edge off, and I definitely recommend them for when anxiety is becoming immobilizing.

I know many people who have benefited from writing.  It doesn't seem to be my thing, but maybe I'm not giving it a fair try.

So those tools help dial down the anxiety enough for me to start to work through the cause of the anxiety... .which is a whole other topic.

BG

I dont really get much feedback, I dont know if its seen as an "eye roll" thing, but cutting down on all stimulants; caffeine and smoking made a very noticeable difference.

Also taking plenty of rest, even during the day lie down for half an hour as still as possible.

Get blood pressure checked regularly, if too high, do something about it.

Good night sleep is essential.

Im a fan of herbal remedies (and no, not weed anymore ) because a lot of anxiolytics have a short duration of action, build up tolerance quickly and can then give rebound effects.

I started taking Ashwaganda 3 times a day and just drink chamomile tea each evening. I dont have anywhere near the anxiety I had, I think its all these things combine together in addition to the list you made, especially diet and exercise.

Even if something is just placebo effect, who cares, if it works its worth doing right.

What do you do about high blood pressure Cromwell? Mines though the roof.  Diet, exercise, no stimulants? I need to do all three... .what else?

High blood pressure and high cholesterol most often go together. For both, diet is the key, losing weight helps a lot if currently overweight.

Diet in fruit and vegetables doesnt matter which ones but especially those with vitamins b6, E and C which lower blood pressure.

a salt free diet is a must.

for stimulants I have a coffee in the morning, but shouldnt. but its a vast improvement from one every hour. Hydrotherapy is also a very helpful option of restoring the circulation and relax the nerves and muscles.

if tense or worried this raises the blood pressure too, breathing exercises help to bring it back down It is also about aiming for as relaxing and calm a life as possible in the midst of day to day concerns. Take 30mins break from work lying back in a chair with curtains close, ear plugs and no noise.

Turkish my resting blood pressure was too high, ive read a few of the popular diet books but they are all rubbish, directed towards the mass market. If your high blood pressure is linked to overweight and/or cholesterol building up, its essential to avoid any animal related foods, besides maybe an egg or 2 a week.  Fanatically change your diet for just 3 months and save yourself a lifetime on medications and far worse as hypertension is the precursor to cardio vascular disease. Dont get me wrong, im not a vegetarian, I enjoy meat, its just that for the sake of a few months getting that cholesterol plague removed and blood pressure back to normal, its worth it. Oatmeal for breakfast is great because it binds to cholesterol. Just one tablespoon mixed into some museli (not store bought, make yourself). Watch out for milk too, 12g or so cholesterol per litre. I just take some yoghurt add a teaspoon lemon juice to 3tbsp water, add in a grated apple, tsp of honey.

You reminded me I want to buy a monitor and chart my progress, at the moment I get it done at the gym but I think its better to have one at home as well.

I'm still struggling with what to do with the anxiety, in part because I struggle to recognize that it is anxiety when I'm experiencing it.   I'm getting better at that, so I take it the next step is to bet better at the ways of dealing with it.

I do know that physical activity is one of the best ones, but I have found that just trying to commit to "exercise regularly" or "exercise more" doesn't quite work for me.  The training program that I followed for a sprint triathlon I did at the beginning of June was a lifesaver for me.  It was one of the key things that got me through those last couple of months before finally telling my stbx that I needed to separate.  Having the structure of a plan to follow and a scheduled event that I was building towards helped to keep me accountable and on task.  I did miss maybe 3-4 workouts over the course of an 8 week, 6-days-a-week training plan, but given the circumstances I actually managed to not beat myself up about it.

As you indicated BeagleGirl, getting out in nature can be especially helpful.  This is one I need to do more.  Going for a hike combines the benefits of physical activity, but my T said it is even good to just go sit in a park.  I have also heard gardening can be a good option for this as well.

For me, one of the bigger physical indicators of my anxiety is heart palpitations (and probably slightly higher blood pressure, which I do occasionally feel pounding in my head even though I don't get a headache from it).   I have seemingly always had the palpitations to some degree... .usually increasing with caffeine intake, so I try to control that.  But they really started ramping up in the last 3-4 months, and over the past few weeks (the first weeks of my separation) it feels like they're happening almost constantly.  I know it's not quite constant... .in part, I think I'm just more aware of them.  Still, because I have started worrying about possible other causes, and I don't want that to compound my anxiety, I finally scheduled an appointment with a cardiologist just to make sure there is nothing else going on.

mw

BeagleGirl, this is a great topic to discuss, thanks for posting!

What works for me for anxiety is:

Vigorous exercise: running 2-3 times a week, alternating with light weight training (though I've been a little lazy with the weights lately).
Eating a healthy diet and drinking chamomile tea in the evenings (when my anxiety was at its worst, I was drinking 3-4 cups a day--a lot but better than the excessive alcohol consumption I've done in the past).
Journaling is helpful to me. Sometimes it's a lot of rambling on and on (hard to imagine to anyone who's read my posts, right?), but it helps get it out of my system and I can then calm down. Very cathartic.
Spending time in nature, definitely.
Praying helps me, and I know many swear by meditation. I've tried that a few times, probably just need more practice, as I have the attention span of a gnat. 

I do go through periods where I have heart palpitations as well, but that could be a combination of post r/s stress, work stress, and hormone changes due to my age (49). My blood pressure has always been okay, but I could probably cut back a little on the caffeine (2 big cups of coffee, 1 cup of green tea a day).

What do you all do to get quality sleep?
 I don't sleep well, and haven't for years. The chamomile helps, and I also take an OTC sleep aid. I'd like to get off of that but even with it, I only get about 6 hours a night (with waking up a couple of times). That's a good night. I try to have a calming routine at night, and I don't have caffeine after about 2:30 pm. I read myself to sleep every night. I can't just lie down and sleep--my brain won't turn off. Maybe that's where the meditation would be helpful?

I didn't find writing helpful unless I allowed myself to go totally stream of consciousness.  If I actually thought about what I was writing it only made me more anxious.  On the other hand, if I wrote without thinking, it calmed me.  I ended up with some weird sh!t on the page, and nothing that I would ever want anyone to read later, but really it wasn't meant for anyone but me.

Also, I started out writing TO my ex.  Later I switched to writing to myself without even noticing I was doing it.  I say this all in past tense because I don't need to write about my ex or my relationship with him very often anymore.