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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: jxeer on September 06, 2018, 09:42:17 PM



Title: partner has broken up with me about once a week every week for about two years
Post by: jxeer on September 06, 2018, 09:42:17 PM
I'm happy to be able to name this experience. My BP partner has broken up with me about once a week every week for about two years with the exception of a few months this Winter and Spring.


Title: partner has broken up with me about once a week every week for about two years
Post by: MeandThee29 on September 07, 2018, 05:05:00 PM
No pattern. Decades-old marriage, but escalating threats of divorce/separation when we were together over a number of years. In separation, he's said "this is it" maybe 6-8 times or so?

It all seems perfectly normal to him. He doesn't understand my skepticism and recently asked for reconciliation again. I didn't agree to his terms, and we are "broke up" again.

The key is that I have boundaries. It helped me to write out all of the repeating behaviors and what my response should be. Then I can look at it again if there's contact.

Life is good!


Title: partner has broken up with me about once a week every week for about two years
Post by: BreatheFirst on September 07, 2018, 05:23:29 PM
5 break ups in 5 years. So good  to know I'm not alone. He would break up about each year, i think have a replacement waiting. He would move to the spare bedroom, not talk to me for about 4 weeks. Then we had to start sorting legals house etc he would try and reconcile. He moved out this time (5th time) then asked to come back (for financial reasons). I said no.

I had had enough of the pattern. But I still love him, I miss him but not some of the behaviours. At least I know no more of that pattern and eventually there will be stability. But we have kids together so no real escape from his behaviours.


Title: Re: partner has broken up with me about once a week every week for about two years
Post by: Mutt on September 08, 2018, 02:51:19 PM
Breaking up once a week in your two year r/s had to of been stressful. I separated  several time and it was always around the same time of the year I think SAD could of been a part of it. I actually enjoyed it because it gave me a break and a chance to recharge my batteries.

How did you deal with did you know that it wa coming and rolled with it? We’re you feeling you were walking on eggshells all of time? What would you do if you saw this behaviour in a future partner?


Title: Re: partner has broken up with me about once a week every week for about two years
Post by: Harley Quinn on September 09, 2018, 02:16:47 AM
Hi jxeer,

How does the relationship stand at present? What are your feelings about the future?

Love and light x