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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: BPB Mom on September 18, 2018, 01:50:10 PM



Title: Wanting to hear from others in this situation
Post by: BPB Mom on September 18, 2018, 01:50:10 PM
I’m new to this page.im the mother of a 16 year old with symptoms of BPD. The symptoms were exasperated by anxiety and depression when her father died(suicide) last October . We have an AWESOME therapist doing DBT (?) therapy and has taught me a lot. BUT I’m in need of support . I am single, and not of my friends and family don’t understand BPD and look at my daughter as a behavior problem. God is at the center of my life so I know she will be ok, but I’d like to hear from others in my situation .
I look forward to hearing from you.


Title: Re: Wanting to hear from others in this situation
Post by: Harri on September 18, 2018, 03:23:22 PM
Hi.  Welcome to the board.  I am so sorry to hear of your daughter's illness and her father's suicide.  That is a lot to deal with and I am very glad you reached out here for support.  That is so important. 

 
Excerpt
I am single, and not of my friends and family don’t understand BPD and look at my daughter as a behavior problem.
This, unfortunately, is common.  Most people don't understand that it is not just a behavioral problem, it goes so much deeper than that.  I am sorry you are dealing with that as well.  The good news is that you came here and we get it. 

I hope you feel free to look around and read other posts and respond as you see fit.  Have you had a chance to look at the articles over on the right side of the page?  We have tools and lessons that can not just help you help your daughter but also help you help yourself.  I am glad you both have support from a wonderful therapist but you need something just for you.

I hope to hear more from you soon. 


Title: Re: Wanting to hear from others in this situation
Post by: SkellyII on September 18, 2018, 08:32:23 PM
I’m new to this page.im the mother of a 16 year old with symptoms of BPD. The symptoms were exasperated by anxiety and depression when her father died(suicide) last October . We have an AWESOME therapist doing DBT (?) therapy and has taught me a lot. BUT I’m in need of support . I am single, and not of my friends and family don’t understand BPD and look at my daughter as a behavior problem. God is at the center of my life so I know she will be ok, but I’d like to hear from others in my situation .
I look forward to hearing from you.

Hi BPB Mom

A lot of us here can relate to you. I'm a single dad, fairly new to the board, with a 16 year old daughter that's been diagnosed with BPD, along with depression and anxiety. I've had full custody, since her mom's last suicide attempt. I don't have family (deceased), but am fortunate enough to have some friends that have a least a basic understanding of mental health issues.

Glad to hear you have a really good therapist! Like yourself, we had a really awesome one that helped both of us out immensely. I've found that it's really important to have a therapist that you're both comfortable with, and can talk to both of you. Unfortunately, ours just left the business due to health issues, and we're currently breaking in a new one.

The other thing that was helpful was the DBT group that my daughter and I attended. They would segregate the parents and adolescents for part of the evening, so that we could talk about how things were going, and offer each other support.

Take care and let us know how you're doing. And remember that you're not alone on this journey.


Title: Re: Wanting to hear from others in this situation
Post by: Bright Day Mom on September 19, 2018, 05:22:07 PM
I  :hi: you along with the others.

So sorry to learn what you are going thru.  Though I am not a widow, my D was 16 when one of her friends completed (2-1/2 yrs ago).  Our world spiraled out of control! 

You are so much smarter than I was by reaching out and seeking support. Many of our friends shunned us and we weren't often invited, they simply didn't understand. I have to admit, I don't think I would understand either until I was thrust into the fire!  It is all unimaginable.

God is in my core as well and often times it was Him who got me thru sleepless nights when my daughter was hospitalized, in residential, or simply at home in her own room alone @ night.

My D will be 19 in Jan and I think we may be hitting a healthy stride day-to-day; but we'll see.

Know there are plenty of supportive people here that will never judge and can lend an ear.

"With God all things are possible" Matthew 19:26   -  Scripture was written on a journal cover I had given my daughter when she was in residential for 8 months.  At the time, she had doubt in Him.   She now has it tattooed.