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Title: My daughter is in Germany and was just diagnosed Post by: JMax on June 28, 2019, 07:02:55 PM She's been hospitalized at least twice before but was diagnosed bpd upon release last week. I have been living for 4 years with ovarian cancer and I think she was triggered by that, among several other things, when she visited last fall. She was telling people she was coming back but once she got back to Berlin, she seemed to be very disappointed in and angry at us. We still love her as much as ever but don't know what to do. Her sister will be there in a couple weeks and she would love your tips and ideas on what to do when she goes into a rage.
Title: Re: My daughter is in Germany and was just diagnosed Post by: FaithHopeLove on June 28, 2019, 07:51:41 PM Hello Jmax and welcome to the group. You have come to the right place for help and support. I am sorry to hear about your daughter and her rages. Has she been diagnosed with BPD? I am also sorry to hear about your ovarian cancer. That must be scary for both you and your daughter. I can see how it would lead an emotionally sensitive person into a rage. What else tends to set her off? How have you handled her rages before? We are here for you.
Hugs Faith Title: Re: My daughter is in Germany and was just diagnosed Post by: JMax on July 04, 2019, 08:27:42 AM As I stated in the beginning of my question, yes, she has been diagnosed with BPD. I don't deal with her rages on a day-to-day basis because I am 5000 miles away. There are many things that upset her including gender issues, politics, government policies both in Germany and the US, and just about any topic. She isn't on speaking terms with me right now so I don't have to worry about saying the wrong thing.
Title: Re: My daughter is in Germany and was just diagnosed Post by: FaithHopeLove on July 04, 2019, 08:36:23 AM I am sorry for asking a question you already answered. As for advising your daughter how to handle your other daughter's BPD rages I can only say safety first. That means both physical and emotional safety. If there is danger get away! Beyond that, if there is something she can validate such as the feeling of frustration behind the rages that can help
My BPD son rages sometimes. I find that if I speak calmly to him and express empathy for his frustration he will often calm down. So safety first , then validation and empathy. Does that make sense? |