BPDFamily.com

Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: sk123 on July 26, 2019, 12:51:50 PM



Title: GF Cuts her arms sends me pictures of it and blames me for it
Post by: sk123 on July 26, 2019, 12:51:50 PM
Hello everyone, Last night me and my gf were with my brother and his gf and in front of her i made a joke about passing a fake "Joint" to my brother is was the end of a banana peel and she got mad and broke up with me (she hates weed) the thing is i dont even smoke it... later on that day she calls several times i do not respond and she flips out and started sending me pictures of her cutting herself my natural response was to just get away from her as she is clearly doing it as a way to manipulate me blaming me for the way she is when all i ever did was make a joke she did not agree with. She had never done this while i was with her for 6 months i still am deeply concerned for her well being and i am aware she has had a rough past i don't know what to do my heart tells me stay away another part tells me to help her seek help.


Title: Re: GF Cuts her arms sends me pictures of it and blames me for it
Post by: Still Here on July 26, 2019, 02:14:30 PM
That's an incredibly tough situation.  I've been there myself a few times.  My BPDw will sometimes carve words from our arguments into her arm or leg. It's awful.

I've had people tell me that these instances are emergencies and that I need to call in professional help.  I've had other people tell me that it's attention seeking behavior and that I can't reward it by freaking out.

Two questions:

1) Does she have a history of cutting or suicidal ideation?

2) If she does have a history of cutting, does it make her feel better?

Hang in there.

SH


Title: Re: GF Cuts her arms sends me pictures of it and blames me for it
Post by: sk123 on July 26, 2019, 02:42:01 PM
She does have a history of cutting herself and she has told me she has had a suicide attempt before.

From what i know i dont believe she enjoys it or gets satisfaction out of it.


Title: Re: GF Cuts her arms sends me pictures of it and blames me for it
Post by: Waddams on July 26, 2019, 03:35:03 PM
Report to Police/Emergency Responders as a suicidal ideation/threat she expressed to you. You can go to a local precinct, ask to speak with a desk officer on duty about the situation, provide copies of the texts/pics, and give them her contact info.

Then I highly suggest you let her go. People this sick are a lot of things, deserving of a lot of compassion and help, but one thing they are not is good relationship partners unless/until they get help and make a lot of progress in healing.


Title: Re: GF Cuts her arms sends me pictures of it and blames me for it
Post by: GaGrl on July 26, 2019, 05:44:55 PM
I agree -- it is not your place to determine how serious she might be. Go to the police with photos. At the least, they can do a welfare check.

She may never have had someone hold her accountable for her actions. If she was doing this to seek attention, she will learn that, with you, the consequence is police involvement. If she was serious, you have interfered the right way.