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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: Woolspinner2000 on August 25, 2019, 09:32:48 AM



Title: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: Woolspinner2000 on August 25, 2019, 09:32:48 AM
Yesterday was the anniversary of my dad's death.
Last Monday was the anniversary of my uBPD mom's death.
Today is my wedding anniversary, and I have been separated from DH since January.

Sighs...
It's just one of those days. I'm hanging in there. Just wanted to share with my online family and have you sit with me today.

Thanks.

 :hug:
Wools



Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: Harri on August 25, 2019, 10:33:42 AM
I'm here with you.  I've got my comfy chair and a cup of coffee so I am pretty settled in (I was up late so I just woke up!). 


Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: I Am Redeemed on August 25, 2019, 11:32:20 AM
Got my coffee, too, though I have been up since 7:30 and drinking coffee ever since *)

I'm sorry you have so many emotional landmark days in a row, Wools. That's very hard, but I'm here with you and Harri in our virtual chairs to sit with you. :hug:


Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: GaGrl on August 25, 2019, 11:57:31 AM
I had two cups of coffee and moved on to Diet Coke -- I'm here now also.

The body "knows" anniversaries of sadness and trauma. I have down time in August each year. My sister, my father, and my grandfather died in August. Sometimes I'm aware of it -- sometimes I find myself deep in the doldrums before I realize why I'm feeling as I do.

I don't have any advice. I'm just sitting with you.



Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: Kwamina on August 25, 2019, 12:10:47 PM
Hi Wools,

Some tough days in quick succession :hug:

Yes, I'm still sitting with you, never left actually and am still fiercely protective:
(https://bit.ly/2MEkJKy)

I'm drinking...water:
(https://bit.ly/2NsFQz7)


Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: Harri on August 25, 2019, 12:30:15 PM
Oh!  I can see you perking up already Woolite:


(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRdgEfBWV2N_kYisJUpk99QzQ2dnR4hvRnd5kCX3cCYmlAehqGB)

though it makes me wonder what is in your coffee...

Kwamina... we need to do some work on your reading skills. 

What is it with anniversaries?  My mothers birthday anniversary is in 2 days.  I find I am sadder around her birth date than I am around her death date.  Go figure


Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: Kwamina on August 25, 2019, 12:48:25 PM
Looks like Woolite was also drinking Coke *)

Kwamina... we need to do some work on your reading skills.  

Well you cannot actually see what's in the can so it could be water you know. Also, Coke contains water so the parrot has got all his bases covered! :)


Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: Woolspinner2000 on August 25, 2019, 04:16:02 PM
Thanks everyone for sitting with me today. And drinking coffee and Coke...and water...theoretically, we will say water since the Board Parrot says so.  :) It's pretty funny to see llamas drinking out of a pop can! I actually had iced tea with you all.  |iiii

D30 and her hubby were up visiting this week from out of state. I just got them on the road for a long return trip to their home. She needed help getting packed up back at our house (she has Lyme disease and the emotional pull of the trip, first time back since mom and dad separated, etc. has left her exhausted), going through the last of her stack of boxes in the attic. I needed her to get through them as I anticipate getting our house up for sale, some day in the future. I almost started crying as I watched her go around and say goodbye to the house as she wandered through each room before she got in the car. Whew. That was hard. She may very well not be back again before it is gone. I had to go outside in order to not fall apart.

DH texted that he is having a hard time; I responded that I'm having my own moments. It's not a 'happy' anniversary at all. Nonetheless, it is an anniversary. Harri, my dad's birthday was August 15th, and that was actually a day when I felt more aware of losing him than yesterday. There is something to be said about these anniversary days in our lives.

All this to say I know that it is okay to feel what we feel. I keep reminding myself of that right now. If I just let the feelings wash over me, like the waves on an ocean shore, it will be okay. They'll ebb and wane. My biggest emotion today is plain ole grief.

Wools


Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: JNChell on August 25, 2019, 08:42:24 PM
Hi, Wools. I’m a late comer to the party, but wanted to reach out. You’re right, it’s ok to feel what we feel. We feel it because we need to. I’m sorry that grief was your dominant feeling today. The thing is, is that you know how to handle those feelings, categorize them and let them go away with grace. Happy Sunday, Wools. :hug:


Title: Re: Today is my 35th anniversary
Post by: Zabava on August 25, 2019, 10:15:54 PM
I'm sorry you're having such a heavy day. I hope you had time to enjoy the sunshine you mentioned. :hug: