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Title: 20 years in Post by: Bd53! on October 05, 2019, 11:56:55 AM :help: I feel such relief even finding this message board. My daughter has been diagnosed with Bpd, & has worked hard going thru dbt twice, & we’ve worked hard together to be close. My difficulty is my relationship with my partner. He has terrible rage in him, seems never to be happy, even when we’re doing something enjoyable, he can’t take pleasure in it. He has punched holes in doors, screamed, often told me I’m the cause of all his problems. (Lost a phone once, & he went nuts, someone was going to find it, hack all our finances & drain us, & everything in his life was my fault—when he rages things get all mixed in.) I literally stayed up till dawn changing every password I had). Being around him makes me very anxious. He’s never hit me, but has smashed things, thrown things, punched holes. One email after work hours can also send him in a fit. I have to take the dog in the car & drive around for a couple of hours, as she gets very anxious, too. He does not give verbal or physical affection. Could he be bpd?
Title: Re: 20 years in Post by: Harri on October 06, 2019, 08:40:34 PM Hi and welcome!
It is hard to say if he has BPD but he certainly has some very difficult and highly concerning behaviors. How involved was he in the diagnosis and treatment of your daughter? I am wondering if there is any parallel he can draw between his behavior and those of your daughter? The physical aggression is concerning. When you lave to drive around how does he respond? Are you ever able to talk with him about his behaviors during a calm time when he might agree to leave the house when he gets upset? You can also contact the Domestic Violence hotline who can direct you to local resources for help. https://www.thehotline.org We also have a safety plan here on this site located here: Safety First (https://bpdfamily.com/pdfs/safety-first-dv-1.pdf) Please fill out the safety plan. We can help you do it here if you'd like. |