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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup => Topic started by: Moonlight93 on November 01, 2019, 06:17:03 PM



Title: He messaged escorts and swingers all behind my back...
Post by: Moonlight93 on November 01, 2019, 06:17:03 PM
My bpd bf may not be my boyfriend any longer.
It’s been almost a week since I found the escort messages and swinger websites. I set limits on what he must do to stay with me and work on this and he keeps breaking them and testing the boundaries. He’s in therapy but I don’t know if he’s actually telling her everything AND he always arrives late. Today he was 20mins late...he so has a dialectic therapy book to work through but he doesn’t actually do it often enough or practice it.

I am so hurt and I feel like I am punishing him by tracking his location, his accounts, locking his phone and the internet down. AND asking him not to pleasure himself after all the horrible messages he sent to other women and men and lady boys. He really is lost and PLEASE READ (https://bpdfamily.com/safe-site.htm)ed in the head.

I can’t stop but feel like I want to hurt him how he did me. I am desperately trying to get him to realise the damage he has done to this relationship and how unless he owns his mistakes and is truly sorry for them I cannot forgive and move forward.

I am so tired, so paranoid and feel I deserve A LOT better!

Am I losing my mind?


Title: Re: He messaged escorts and swingers all behind my back...
Post by: Gemsforeyes on November 01, 2019, 08:08:28 PM
I’m very sorry, Moonlight.  Your BF has an illness.  The answer is not to hurt him the way he has hurt you.

You started a thread last week on this topic and people were actively engaging with you.  Perhaps return to that thread?

Warmly,
Gems